Zebra Cakes, Heart Eyes & the Sweetest Obsession
by assilem33
Summary: SPIN OFF OF YMSM: She nods, wide-eyed and so damn innocent. "School's out for the summer. I'll be seeing a lot of you, J." She leans even further over the counter, having to get on her tip toes. "I'll be kissing you all summer." Fuck me. "Don't you want to kiss me, J?" Rated M for later. Should probably read YMSM first, but I wouldn't say you HAVE to.
1. Prologue

**I've finally decided I'm going to do it. Low and Jasper are getting their FULL story. I need something sweet to counteract with my stress induced Undeniable story.**

**This shorty is just a start, and gosh, I love the fucking hell out of Jasper. I can't wait to give them an HEA with **_**everything.**_** I'm just itching for it.**

* * *

Prologue

-JW-

I knew the second I laid eyes on my girl; she was going to be mine forever.

I fucking called that shit.

Six years ago, she walked in to her dad's office with that messy hair, those rosy red cheeks, and that cute as fuck smile, and I was done for.

Today, I'm marrying her, and fuck me, it's been a long time coming.

Standing at the altar, I can feel myself fucking shaking with the need to run down this damn aisle and drag my girl to me.

_Let's go, B._

_Come fucking marry me._

When the music starts and the doors open and my girl comes into view, _goddamn_, I've never seen anyone so damn beautiful.

Shit, she's fucking perfect.

When she blinds me with her smile, I can feel my own stretching across my face, and my heart is trying to pound out of my fucking chest.

_Faster, girl, I want to fucking marry you._

Her dad leads her down the aisle, and Liam has to hold me back with a hand on my shoulder, so I don't rush her and carry her up here.

Her smile never wavers from me, and I am so fucking caught up in her, my pretty girl.

I am the luckiest fucking guy on the planet.

When her hand is in mine, I pull her to me, and give her a quick kiss, more than I should, less than I want to.

She giggles and tip toes closer to me. "Hey, J," she whispers through her smile.

"Hey, B," I whisper back, love-sick and obsessed. "You gonna marry me?"

"Heck yes," she says, nodding her head excitedly. "I can't wait to be your wife."

_Fuck yes, she's going to be my fucking _wife.

It's about damn time.


	2. xo

**Twilight is not mine. No copyright infringement intended.**

**I'm excited to get into things. Most of my outtakes will be made into more detailed chapters until I'm caught up. I don't want to leave any first cute moments out.**

* * *

Chapter 1  
**xo**

-HM-

Seth _kissed _me.

I kind of feel weird about it. It was my first kiss, and he's so cute, but it didn't feel life changing or anything.

I thought for sure I'd feel different, but I don't at all.

He's so cute, though, and maybe after _more _kisses, I'll start to really feel the butterflies.

I thought Leah was going to have a heart attack when she walked up on us in the hallway where the mall bathrooms are. That in itself was _weird_, kissing so close to the bathrooms.

Kind of gross, actually.

Leah always says I have too high of expectations for boys, and I _really _do. When you have a mom and dad like mine, you want what they have times one thousand.

I won't settle for anything less than hearts and flowers and the soul changing kind of love.

Who would want less than _that_?

Dad says I deserve nothing but the best, so that's what I'm going for; the absolute most _perfect_ best.

Gosh, I can't _wait._

After dropping Seth and Leah off, I drive through and get dinner. Mom took the boys out today, and I told her I'd pick something up, so she didn't have to cook. Even though, we all prefer her cooking to fast food.

Mom is the freaking best. She's all about us kids and dad, and she loves the crap out of us. We would be lost without her.

When I pull up to the house, mom and dad are both home, and I'm so freaking excited to tell mom – _never dad_ – about my first kiss. She's going to be so excited for me, but then we won't be able to really talk about it with the house so full of boys.

"Low," Maddox yells when I push through the front door, tackling my legs in a hug. "You got nuggets?"

"Maybe," I tease. "You'll have to wait and see."

"You did," he giggles. "I can tell."

I giggle with him, and he follows me into the kitchen. "Where's mom and dad?"

Maddox makes a _yucky_ face. "Daddy kissed mommy. It was gross."

_Just wait, Mad, until it's your turn._

He runs off, and I set the table for dinner, so we can all eat together. No matter what's happening, mom loves for us to spend our dinners together. It's the best time of the day.

That sounds sappy, but our big bunch really does love each other.

Ollie and Noah come down, acting like starving animals, but I send them off with Maddox and Max, then mom's next, and I'm kind of really excited to tell her about Seth _even_ if it wasn't anything like I thought it would be. It was still my first kiss and first kisses are important.

I'm sure not as important as _last_kisses, but _still._

"Hi, mom. I brought burgers. Mad got nuggets."

_I had my first kiss!_

"Dad's in the shower. We'll eat when he gets done."

I nod and feel my face heating as my eyes peek into the living room. Mom knows something's up immediately because she _always_ knows.

"What?" She asks, her eyes wide and _knowing._

"Mom," I whisper, kind of wishing I could say that this one kiss changed my world. "Seth _kissed_ me!"

"Oh my gosh," she says, bouncing a little on her toes, making me want to bounce on mine, too. "How was it?"

_Nothing like I hoped it would be._

"Mom," I say, kind of embarrassed that I didn't absolutely love it. "Don't make this awkward."

Even though I'm the one making it awkward. I don't know why I care so much. I'm only 16. I can't expect the _best _right now.

Even if I really _really _want it.

"What! You can't tell me things and then expect me not to ask!" She laughs, and I smile because really _she's_ making me smile.

Dad walks into the room, and even though I'd _never_ in a million years tell him about Seth and _kisses_, I love talking to him. "Hi, dad."

"Hey, babe." He kisses my cheek. "How was your day at the mall?"

He gives me all of his attention, so I tell him how I ate both Burger King and Sabarros at the food court, and how we went to Bath and Body Works – my favorite store ever – but I didn't buy anything.

"Why not?"

I shrug. "I have so much already plus I just love to go and smell everything." I grin, and he chuckles. "I told them no onion on your burger."

He nods, and then yells for the boys to come and eat.

I'm freaking starving.

I'm _always_ hungry. Mom says it's not fair that I can eat and eat and not gain any weight, but she's the _same_ way.

I hand out everyone's food, and laugh when Maddox climbs onto dad's lap. He never wants to sit in his own chair.

I inhale my second burger of the day and listen to everyone trying to talk at once, and when I slip and say that Leah _and _Seth went to the mall, I want to shove the rest of my burger in my mouth, so I don't have to talk about it.

Dad _hates_ the idea of me and _boys._ It's silly, really, because every girl should have that perfect somebody. It's just dad will never think anyone is good enough for his princess.

_Unless_ he's the very best.

"Seth?" Dad says, glancing at mom before his eyes are back on me. "A boy?"

"Uhhh…" Mom's trying to hide her smile, and I don't really want to talk about it, but dad's _asking_, and it's rude not to answer. "Yes."

"Who sat in front?"

Gosh, I'm so glad Leah fought to the death to sit in front. I didn't want to have to lie. "Leah."

"When do I meet Seth?"

_Oh my gosh!_

"Daddy," I kind of whine, a little embarrassed. "He's just a friend." Max snorts, and I give him a dirty look because he's only making it worse on me. "Be quiet, Max."

He holds up his hands, acting like he's all innocent. "I didn't say anything." His dumb grin comes out, and he makes it so hard to be mad at him.

Not that I'm even mad.

"Low," dad says, and I lift my eyes to meet his. "If you're hanging out with a boy, I want to meet him."

I shove a few extra salty, extra crispy fries into my mouth before responding. "If I hang out with him again, you can meet him first."

"Good."

Mom winks at me, and I feel my face redden, kind of liking the idea of hanging out with Seth more. I think he should kiss me again. Maybe it was the bathrooms that ruined my first kiss.

After all, a first kiss should be _special_.

* * *

-JW-

"Come on, Jas, man, you're so fucking boring."

Liam bangs on my door, but I ignore him, scrolling through my piece of shit laptop. I signed up for night classes through Peninsula, something I should have done straight out of high school.

Shit, I never liked school, so I thought taking a two year break would be a good thing but all it's done is get me shit jobs and my cousin as a roommate.

Liam's cool, but he's into the party scene, and I'm not or at least I'm fucking _over_ it.

Hopefully this job I put in for will give me a call back, and I can start looking for my own place. Liam will be pissed, but it's time for me to do my own thing.

"Jasper," Liam yells. "Quit being a fucking pussy. Come hang out."

Damn, I really don't fucking want to, but Liam won't leave me alone until I show my face at least for a while.

Setting my laptop to the side, I shove my feet into a pair of shoes and head down the hall, and of course Liam's got a girl on his lap and beer cans everywhere.

I've never been that into drinking, but I'll _drink_ when I feel like it, but tonight I'm not feeling it.

Heidi, she's already giving me those damn vibes, sitting on the couch, a beer in her hand, and I'm just so fucking tired of the girls that come through here, desperate for attention. She's pretty, I won't fucking lie, but I've had her and I'm not looking for more.

Not just from her, but from anyone.

Yeah, I sound like a pussy, but the shit's getting old. I wasted two years of my life fucking off, and with my dad all over my ass, just damn, I want to start doing things right.

"Hi, Jasper," Heidi says, fluttering her overlong lashes.

"How's it going, Heidi?"

She nods and tries to do some goddamn flirty head nod, and I'm fucking out.

"I'll see you later, Lee."

"Fuck, you're leaving?"

I grab my keys from the table and stop at the door. "I'll be back later."

He waves me off, and I head out, fucking relieved when Heidi doesn't follow me.

I never thought I'd see the day where I'm running from girls, and I feel kind of fucking stupid about it.

I drive over to my mom and dad's, hoping for a good damn meal, and she doesn't disappoint.

"Thanks, ma. I was starving."

"You boys need to shop right," she says, ruffling my hair, and I don't care if I look like a spoiled little bitch, my mom is the shit.

Now my dad, he's been on my ass my entire life. I'm sure he means well, but he just comes off as an overbearing asshole.

"Where's dad?"

"He had to work late. Do you want seconds?"

I nod and shovel chicken, mashed potatoes and corn into my mouth, groaning at how fucking good it tastes.

My mom's right, we do need to shop right.

Or at least fucking cook.

She wraps up a plate for Liam, and if I wasn't stuffed, I'd eat that plate, too.

"Drive safe, son," she says, and I kiss her on the head before going home.

It's a relief to find Liam alone when I get back.

"Oh fuck, what did Mary cook?" I hand him the plate, and he eats that shit with his fingers. "Heidi was real disappointed you left. She wants yo dick, man."

I ignore him. "Slow down, Lee. You're going to choke."

Liam laughs and gets up for a fork and a beer.

"I'll see you in the morning."

"What?" He chokes. "It's like nine."

I chuckle. "I have to work tomorrow."

"Yeah, man, me too. I better sober the hell up."

We both work for the same mechanic down the street. It's shit pay, and Marcus is a real dick, but for now it's money, something we both need.

My fingers are crossed Masen Contracting gives me a shot even if I have no fucking clue what I'm doing. I'll be making double what I make now.

Like I said, Liam's cool, but I'm ready to grow the hell up.


	3. unchained melody

Chapter 2  
**unchained melody**

-HM-

Leah wants to go to the movies, and she's not happy that Seth wants to tag along. I think it's okay because I think our lips got off on the wrong foot and we need to try again. I can have a do over of my first kiss.

My entire family is outside, messing around and building a pen for Maddox's new pig. I never thought we would own a pig. I kind of want to ask dad for a pony just to see what he would say. Not that I really want a pony but it would be so freaking adorable.

Mom's on the patio on her phone when I finally decide to go outside. She will have no problem with it, I know it, but it's dad that I'm worried about. The last time I hung out with Seth, he said that the next time he'd have to meet him.

It's just so weird because I don't even know if I like Seth like that. His cute face - he's totally freaking cute - doesn't make him _loveable. _

"Mom," I say, standing next to her chair. "Can I go to the movies with Leah tonight?" Maybe I won't even mention Seth unless they specifically ask.

"Is Seth going?"

_Gosh, mom!_

"Mom, do I _have_ to tell dad? He's going to want to meet him. It's not like Seth's taking me out on a _date…_" Leah's the one asking. I think the man of my dreams would ask me himself, not have his sister ask me. Maybe Seth doesn't even like me. It was one kiss. People kiss all the time and have it mean nothing. That's crazy, though. Kisses should mean _everything_. "We're just hanging out. It's going to be weird to introduce him."

She looks up at me, and I know she's going to agree with dad. They _always _take each other's side. "Seth has to meet him if Seth is going, and don't you dare try to lie to him and say he won't be there."

"Ugh, okay," I whine, _sigh_. "Should I tell dad now?"

Dad's hammering away on the pig pen, and I know I have to ask him, and I should just get it over with.

"Yes, go tell him now."

Mom smiles at me, and I smile back before jogging across the yard to dad. He stops hammering and looks over at me when I'm standing beside him. "Hey, babe."

"Hey, dad," I say, smiling up at him, nervous but _not _nervous. What a confusing emotion. "Can I go to the movies with Leah and Seth?"

His eyes narrow a little at Seth's name, and they will _always_ narrow at the mention of a boy's name. He's just lucky that Seth doesn't give me all the butterflies.

"I want to meet him, Low," he finally says, and I smile and wrap my arms around him and hug him because I love him not because he said yes. Dad gives the _best_ hugs.

"Low, come build with me," Maddox says, and I squat down and _build_, and when I glance over my shoulder dad's blowing a kiss to mom, and my heart _warms._

_That's_ what I want. Someone to love me like dad loves mom. That's all I'm ever going to want. Who wouldn't want that?

I can't _wait_ for that.

...

I'm trying to be nice, and Seth holding my hand _is_ nice, but his palm, or maybe it's my palm, is kind of sweaty. I'm sitting between him and Leah, and it's so freaking awkward.

_More _awkward than dad meeting Seth, which I think went pretty well if you don't count the crossed arms and stoic face dad was pulling off or Seth stuttering and nervous.

The man I'm going to love should be brave and not get scared of dads, but maybe I live too much in my head and have unrealistic expectations.

I can't even focus on the movie because my hand is just so sweaty, and it's disgusting and embarrassing.

I don't like sweaty palms and _wrong_ kisses.

Seth is sweet and really cute, but maybe we're just better off as friends.

Leah would like that.

* * *

-JW-

"Let's go get something to eat, man. I'm fucking starving...wait, what the fuck are you doing?"

Liam stands in my doorway staring at me like he doesn't know who the hell I am, but Masen Contracting called me for an interview, and I have to dress up for this shit.

"I have that interview Wednesday," I say, trying to straighten and tie my tie. I look like a goddamn idiot, but I want this job, so I'll do whatever it takes.

"You look like a douche." He laughs and comes all the way into my room. I want to tell him to get the hell out, but he slaps my hands away and ties my tie in no time. I've been trying to tie the damn thing for 20 minutes.

He steps back, crosses his arms and nods.

"What the fuck?" I say, staring in the mirror. "Where'd you learn that?"

He shrugs. "I don't know. Now take that shit off so we can grab some food."

I rip the tie off and toss it on the bed. "Where?"

"Fuck, _anywhere._ Didn't you hear me? I'm fucking starving."

"It's past 9, Lee. We already had dinner."

He shakes his head. "Uh uh, no. Lunchables and Doritos is not fucking dinner. That's a snack. I want a huge ass burger with fries. We'll go to that new place across from the theater."

_Yeah, okay, I'm fucking starving, too. _

"Let me change and we'll go."

"Hurry your ass." He turns to leave. "Oh, and by the way…" he says, smiling like an asshole. "...you're beautiful, man. No way they won't hire you."

I flip him off, and he snorts and leaves me the hell alone.

…

The burger joint is packed, and Liam snags the last booth before some high school kids with attitude problems have the chance.

_Did I use to be one of those asshole kids?_

Liam drums his fingers on the table until the waitress comes by with menus, but we already know what we want so we order straight away.

"I can't believe you're going to leave me alone with that prick."

Chuckling, I rip at the straw paper, tearing it into pieces. "I don't even have the job, Lee."

"You'll get it."

Our burgers come, and we eat in silence not that the diner is silent. Teenagers from all ages laugh and carry on, and Liam looks like he wants to join them. He likes to be the center of attention but knows damn well he's too old to hang with that crowd.

Liam orders a milkshake, and I sit back and watch as he flirts with the waitress, making her blush and giggle. He's a piece of work. I used to be like him, though. I don't know when I stopped caring about meaningless fucks, but it's a strange feeling to want _more_ than that.

After the waitress writes her number on Liam's arm, we head out. He's high on life, wolf whistling at a girl across the street. She flips him off, and I chuckle when he groans. "Damn, that was hot," he grins, looking over his shoulder.

"You're going to get arrested for harassment," I say, shoving his shoulder.

He's still looking over his shoulder, and I glance back and catch the girl's eyes on us. "Fuck, I think she wants me, man."

"She looks young." _Really _young.

He licks his lips as she flips her short, dark hair, and I push him toward the car before he gets himself into trouble.

"You're no fun, Jas."

I shake my head and start the car, pulling down the street the opposite way to keep Liam from breaking the fucking law and drive us home.

* * *

-HM-

_Oh my gosh!_

Seth kisses me in front of Leah outside the theater, and I can feel the heat in my face and the twisted mess in my stomach.

I'm trying to like it. I'm _trying_ to be okay with the messy lips and demanding tongue, but it doesn't feel right. It feels nothing like it should.

"God," Leah mumbles. "This is kind of gross."

My face heats hotter as Seth pulls back, looking over my face with a silly grin on his face. I smile because if I don't, I might just gag and that would be a horrible, mean thing to do.

He's _so_ nice, but kissing him is unattractive.

Someone whistles across the street, and I see Leah flip them off. She's brave like that. She's not afraid of anything.

When Seth turns around, they're gone and Leah wants to go home. She grabs my hand, whispering, "I don't like my brother kissing you."

_I don't like your brother kissing me._

"I'm sorry," I say, quietly. "I'll stop."

If Leah doesn't like it, it's the perfect excuse to keep Seth as just a friend.

"No," she huffs. "He really likes you. I don't want to be the dumb sister that stops him from liking you."

_Oh gosh._

I look over my shoulder, and Seth walks behind us, his hands shoved into his pockets, his eyes on me.

I'm so _rude_ to think he's a horrible kisser. How do I even know what a good kisser is? Maybe _I'm _the horrible kisser. I bet he's kissed lots of girls and has had lots of practice.

I'll just keep practicing with Seth.

That way when I do have my last kiss, it will be _perfect._


	4. stuck on you

**Low makes me anxious for more. :)**

* * *

Chapter 3  
**stuck on you**

-JW-

_Shit._

I got the job at Masen Contracting, and I feel so fucking relieved right now. Liam's pouting in the seat next to me as I drive to my mom's to celebrate the 4th of July. She called this morning to wish me luck and said to come over after.

Finally, I can fucking do something with my life.

I start on Monday and while I bullshitted my way through that interview, I'll have to make it look like I know what the fuck I'm doing.

Masen seems like a cool guy, and as long as I don't fuck shit up, I should be fine.

How hard could it be to answer phones and talk to customers anyway?

"I hope your mom has a shit ton of beer."

"You know she won't let you drink it," I say, turning down my mom's street.

"I've never understood that. We're adults, man. I'm not even driving."

Chuckling, I park in the driveway. "Not being 21 has something to do with it."

"I'll have to be sneaky." He hops out of the car, and I shake my head and follow him.

The backyard is packed with family and friends of my parents. My mom hugs me and congratulates me on the new job, telling me she knew I could do it. My dad shakes my hand and says some shit about me finally getting my shit together.

It annoys the fuck out of me that he can't just be happy, but I ignore him and grab some food while watching Liam sneaks drinks of forbidden alcohol while my mom's not watching.

He's an idiot.

He takes a seat next to me, his plate piled high. "I thought my mom was coming," he says around a mouthful of burger. "Oh fuck, there she is." He swigs the last of his beer and tosses the bottle behind him which makes it completely obvious that it's his.

"Liam," Aunt Maggie scolds him from across the yard, and he holds his hands up, like he's innocent.

"It won't happen again, ma," he chokes around his food. "Sorry!"

I crack up when he gives me a scared look. "I thought you were an adult, man?"

"Fuck off," he mumbles, stealing my bottle of water, draining it completely before throwing the plastic at my head.

"Liam, be nice to my boy," my mom says as she walks by.

Liam gives me a disgusted look and hisses, "We're getting drunk tonight."

I shake my head and roll my eyes.

Maybe _he _is.

Like I said, I'm over it.

* * *

-HM-

"Thanks, Maximoose," I say, taking a huge bite from the egg sandwich he made me.

He rolls his eyes, but I know he secretly likes our lifelong nickname for him. He's such a pretender when he groans and whines about it. He is got his cooking skills from mom. I got mine from dad, meaning I have _none_. I think I would burn the kitchen down if I tried. I'm so thankful I have and Max here to feed me.

We all turn our heads when the side door opens and mom pushes inside. "Good morning, my babies," she says, kissing each and every one of us.

"Morning, mom. You want eggs?"

"I already ate, babe," she says, smiling up at him. "Thanks. Low, after you eat, I'll expect you to clean the mess."

I _love _mom to death, but kitchen duty is the worse.

"Okay. What time do I need to have it done by?"

"Immediately," she smirks.

"Okay." I finish my egg sandwich in silence, dreading the second I'm done because then I have to clean everyone's mess. I'm not spoiled, and I know how to clean, but I just don't like it.

Mom's disappointed when she finds out that no one can come to her 4th of July barbeque except for Leah and _Seth_.

I wish I could hang out with my best friend without her brother around, but after two kisses and Leah telling me he really likes me, I feel horrible not including him. I won't kiss him, though. _Never _in my own house with my dad here or _without _him here. It wouldn't feel right. It doesn't feel right no matter where we're kissing.

I feel sick to my stomach even _thinking _about it.

Later, I am so relieved that dad watches Seth like a hawk the entire time him and Leah are here for the barbeque. It's kind of funny how scared Seth is of dad.

That's how I know Seth's not meant for me. I should have known it when the kisses made me horrified instead of giving me butterflies, but now I know it.

Sloppy kisses are so not worth it.

* * *

-JW-

When the Masen family pushes into the lobby, I'm on the phone with a potential customer pretending I know what the fuck I'm doing. I have absolutely no experience in this field, and I still feel fucking lucky Masen gave me a chance.

The lady on the phone is asking for blueprints as I glance up and freeze, my eyes glued to the girl yanking on Mrs. Masen's arm and self-consciously messing with her hair.

_Fuck me,_ she's gorgeous.

_Seriously, what the fuck?_

The lady is still babbling, and I distractedly say, "I'll find what you're looking for," before ending the call.

My boss' daughter - if that's who she is - is fucking pretty with all that dark hair and more than sun kissed skin. Her cheeks are blushed pink as she stares at me, her big eyes so fucking enchanting.

"Daddy, Low says he's a hot boy."

_Oh shit._

"Mad!" _Low_ yells, horrified and fucking _cute_.

_Low._

I stand from the desk as my boss gives me a look that says he wants to cut my balls off. _So, she's off limits I take it._ He glances at his daughter, and she flashes a grin, her eyes shooting between both of us.

"Hello. I'm the Mrs to Masen Contracting." Mrs. Masen waves, and no wonder their girl is pretty.

Masen is still giving me the _castration _look, but I grin anyway. "Nice to meet you, ma'am."

"These are out kids. That's Max." She points to the blonde one, the oldest from the looks of it, and then points to the rest of the boys. "Leo, Ollie, Noah, and that little blabbermouth over there with his daddy is Maddox." She opens her mouth to introduce my future wife - if I have anything to say about it - but Leo cuts her off.

"And this is our beautiful sister Harlow, but we call her Low."

She smiles at him, and _fuck me_, I'm a goner. Then she waves at me, still blushing, and yep, I'm so fucking done.

"Wow, six kids," I say, trying like hell not to look like a lovesick little bitch. She's gotta be in high school still. "I'm an only child. Nice to meet you."

Low won't stop looking at me, and she's making it real hard for me to ignore her pretty face.

"Let's get going, babe," Masen says then to me, "If you need anything, let Garrett know. You have his number."

"You got it, boss."

Masen ushers his family out, and Low gives me one last look, and I can't stop the smile that splits my lips.

_Don't bring Low here ever again _I hear Masen say, and I crack up as the door shuts behind them.

Moving back to my seat, I got to the company website and check out Masen's bio.

Low's 17.

_Fucking shit._

* * *

-HM-

The entire car ride to camp, I can't stop thinking about _Jasper_. Mom had to tell me his name since it was never mentioned.

_Jasper._

He is so freaking hot. I couldn't stop looking at him. He's so tall and his eyes are so blue and his hair was so messy and dirty blonde and _perfect._

Dad gave me the _don't you even think about it look_, and of course I could _never_, but he's just so freaking cute.

Maddox grabs my hand, distracting me for literally one second before my mind and thoughts go directly back to Jasper.

I wonder how old he is.

Does he have a girlfriend?

I want to marry him.

I want to at least stalk him on Instagram.

_Duh!_

I use my free hand and pull up my Instagram app, but I don't know his last name. I for _sure _am not asking dad. He will freak out.

I search _Jasper_, and I get so many of them I start to think it's hopeless then I see a tiny thumbnail of that dirty blonde hair and I've _found _him.

His page is private, though.

_No!_

I can't follow him. I'll look so creepy. I zoom in on his tiny profile picture and stare at it longer than what is appropriate if I'm not considering myself a creeper. His bio says he's 20 and enrolled in college.

_Only _three years older than me.

"Low," Maddox says, yanking on my hand. "Rub my head."

Closing my app, I set my phone in my lap and rub Maddox's head.

But the entire time I'm thinking about Jasper.

…

It's been one entire week since I laid eyes on Jasper. Okay, _actually_, I look at his tiny little picture on my phone every single day. I've resorted to creepiness because I just can't get his freaking cute face out of my head.

He's just _so _dang cute.

Max will be home tomorrow, and I know mom has been going crazy without him here with us. We all miss him. It's not a usual thing for us to be separated for too long.

I brought the boys out for pizza, and we have to order so much to feed the hungry animals. Pizza is Maddox's favorite of all time, and he stuffs his face until he can no longer move.

"Can we get ice cream?" He asks, crawling into my lap, pizza sauce all over his face.

I grab a napkin and wipe his face clean before saying, "Isn't your belly full?" I ask but _really _I want ice cream, too.

"It's full, but I saved a little room for dessert." He pats his bloated belly, and I giggle and kiss his cute head.

I have the cutest brothers in the world.

Ollie and Noah fight over the last piece of pizza before we head out. We have an entire pizza left but it's for mom and dad, so we don't steal any.

I go through my playlist and put on Ed Sheeran's _Perfect_ while everyone gets buckled up, and when I lift my head, I gasp when I see Jasper across the street.

_He _looks perfect.

He's walking into the store, and I want to be a complete weirdo and jump out of the car and follow him just to hear his deep voice some more.

I wonder how he kisses.

I want to kiss him and find out.

"Low," Leo says, making me jump and distracting me from the love of my life. "Are we gonna go or what?"

I clear my throat and feel my face redden as I pull out onto the street, leaving Jasper behind.

He gives me butterflies _without_ even touching me.


	5. take my breath away

**I love these two. For some reason they're making me want to write more about Edward and Bella. I can't stop loving this family.**

* * *

Chapter 4  
**take my breath away**

-HM-

"Take care of your sister," dad says, and I can't help it when I roll my eyes and shake my head. It's hard to get mad when I have a dad that loves me so much that he wants me taken care of.

I'm very lucky.

"So, we'll be home at 1," I tease, knowing there's no way in heck dad would ever let that happen.

"Sure, babe," he says, smirking, making me laugh and pull Max away.

I wave over my shoulder, and mom and dad both lift their hands before a crowd of people behind us makes us lose them.

"You played a good game," I tell Max, gripping his arm with mine.

"Thanks, Low."

We push our way through the parking lot and up the stairs to the gym where the dance is being held. The music is already very loud and Max and I separate when I spot Leah and he sees Peter.

Leah's alone - thank God - and I grab her hand and start dancing with her. We giggle and sway to the music for three songs before hands land on my hip, making me squeal and jump around.

It's only Seth, but my gosh, that freaked me out.

He smirks and pulls me against him, and I let him dance with me for the next song. His hands wander a little, and I don't really like it, but he doesn't get too weird or anything, so I just count down the seconds until the song ends.

When it's over, he leans forward like he's going to kiss me and at the last second I turn my head, feeling his lips on my cheek.

My face burns, and he clears his throat. "Sorry." I cringe, and he stares down at me confused, but then Leah's saving my entire life by pulling me away from her brother.

I spot Max across the gym, hanging out with his friends, and then Leah's pulling me into the corridor that leads to the restrooms. "I have to pee so bad," she says, pushing through the door.

My phone beeps and I pull it out of my skirt pocket to find a text from Max.

**can we leave?**

_are you okay?_

**yeah, just tired.**

_okay, I'll be right out._

"Max is ready to go," I call through the door.

"What? No! It just started."

I'm not as disappointed as Leah. I'm glad to leave because if Seth _already _tried to kiss me and the night is still early then he's _really_ going to try to kiss me later. Although, after the embarrassing cheek kiss, he might be mad.

I wasn't trying to make him mad, but I just don't really want to kiss him, and I shouldn't have to do anything I don't want to even if he does really like me.

He's so cute, he can find anyone in school to kiss.

The rest of my kisses will be saved for the boy who's going to steal my heart.

Maybe that boy will be Jasper.

It's been weeks since we met and aside from me seeing him walking into the store across from the pizza place, and of course on my phone when I stalk his profile picture on Instagram, I haven't seen him.

I _really_ would love to see him.

Does he want to see me?

_No, Low, you weirdo. _

"Sorry, I'm just going to go."

"Boo," she calls, and I hear the toilet flush before the door opens. "You're no fun."

I shrug and hide my relief. "I'll call you tomorrow."

"Fine."

We walk out of the bathroom and Max is waiting down the hall. "Party pooper," Leah calls, teasingly.

Max laughs, and I hug Leah before we push into the cold night air. "Sorry, Low. I'm just not in the mood to be here."

I bump him with my shoulder. "It's okay. I was ready to go anyway. Are you sure you're okay?"

He smiles and wraps an arm around my shoulder. "I'm good. Let's go for ice cream, though, before we go home."

"Okay, yeah, I'd die for some ice cream."

"Can I drive…"

"Heck no!" I laugh and race him to the car. He wins, but I have the keys, so it doesn't matter anyway.

I let him pick the music, though.

…

Monday morning I wake up with the sniffles and feel completely like crap, but the only positive thing about clogged nostrils and a scratchy throat is that we're going to dad's office today for lunch.

I _finally _get another glance at Jasper.

The boy I've been obsessing over for weeks.

It's just too bad I'm sick. I probably look frightful. Mom braided my hair, though, so at least this time I'm prepared to see him.

I still can't believe that last time I had just rolled out of bed and walked into the office to see the most beautiful boy I had ever laid eyes on. I'd never been more embarrassed in my life, but I couldn't keep my eyes off him either.

How can dad have such a freaking hot secretary?

When mom pulls into the office parking lot, I pull down the visor and fix my hair, swiping my fingers under my eyes. I'm a little nervous, and I'm probably being stupid because he's a grown boy, and I'm just a stupid girl with a dumb crush. It's just when I looked at him, the butterflies fluttered so hard I thought they were going to tear my stomach right open.

That _has_ to mean something.

Maddox crawls between the two seats jostling me a bit.

"Are you ready?" Mom asks, and I flip the visor up feeling my face heat up.

"Yes," I say and grab the bags before jumping from the car before I feel even more stupid and embarrassed.

When we're at the door, I realize how rude we're going to look stepping into the office with bags of lunch in our hands and _nothing_ for Jasper.

"Mom," I say kind of horrified. "We didn't get anything for Jasper. That's so rude."

Mom gives me a knowing look because she knows _everything_, and then says, "Babe, we also didn't get the rest of dad's employees anything either."

"But at least they're not _seeing_ us walk through with all of these bags."

"He can't have my food. I'm hungry," Max says, making me laugh.

"You're _always _hungry, Mad," I say, ruffling his hair.

"I am," he nods and shrugs.

"Give him mine. I'll share with dad."

I smile so big my face hurts and then pull open the door, ready to see the beautiful boy behind the glass door.

* * *

-JW-

These night classes are kicking my ass. Taking two years off after high school did me no fucking favors. Just ask my dad. He'll tell you. He's been on my ass nearly my entire life. I'm sure he means well, but he comes off as an overbearing asshole.

In between phone calls and other work Masen or the other guys give me, I work on English 101 and my math class. I've never been good at school, and it's really showing now.

A few hours later, I've made three appointments for quotes and finished an English paper.

I feel fucking accomplished right now.

I glance up at the door before starting my math shit, and my heart flips like a bitch when I see Low and her mom with the little one standing outside the glass door.

_Fuck, she's so fucking good looking._

I've had this conversation in my head over and over since I met her weeks ago. _She's off fucking limits. _But it does no good because another glance at her, and the heart wants what the fucking heart wants.

She finally pushes through the door, gracing me with her gorgeous as fuck smile. "Hi, Jasper."

I stand from my chair, so I can see every inch of her better. Her nose is red and she sniffles, and I know she's sick.

_I want to feed her fucking soup._

"Hello, Low." I smile, and even I know it's too fucking big on my face, but I can't help it. "Mrs. Masen. Maddox."

Her voice is raspy from her cold when she holds up a brown bag, kind of blushing. _I more than kind of like her cheeks all flushed. _"We brought dad lunch, but we got you something, too."

No fucking way did this girl bring me lunch.

_Fuck._

I take the bag and say, "Thanks, girl," making her giggle.

She's fucking killing me.

I love my balls, but this girl, she might be fucking worth the loss of my manhood.

Mrs. Masen grabs Low's arm. "We better get your dad his lunch." She pulls Low away, and I want to tug of war her back, but when Low waves, I feel it settle nicely in my gut.

They disappear around the corner, and I hear their murmured voices until the door closes, and I'm left alone with the lunch that a beautiful off limits girl brought me.

_Damn, Low._

…

Later that night, I can't fucking sleep because I can't stop thinking about Low and her pretty face and her kind heart.

She's fucking with my head.

Like a creepy fucking stalker, I found her on Instagram and without friending her - her page isn't private which is so fucking unsafe - looked at every post she's ever posted.

She is so goddamn pretty.

_Unbelievably. _

This may sound weird as shit but I feel this girl in my soul.

I don't know anything about her, but something inside me is claiming her as mine already. But she's off limits. So fucking off limits, but it doesn't make sense for someone who's meant for me to be off limits.

_Shit, I'm so fucked._

I want this girl, I want her so fucking bad, but she's in high school, and I work for her dad.

Grabbing my phone, I pull up her profile again and stare at her, feeling like an idiot but not being able to help myself.

A bang on my door scares the fuck out of me, and I drop my phone on my face, cringing when my nose throbs in pain.

"Jas, man, are you asleep?" Liam calls through the door.

"If I was, I'm not now!"

Damn, my cousin can be so fucking annoying.

"I'm lonely. It's only 8. Come hang out with me." The doorknob rattles. "Why is your door locked? Shit, are you fucking a girl in there?"

Fuck, he's an idiot.

Tossing my phone aside, I rub my nose and pull the door open. Liam peeks his head inside. "Is she hiding?"

"Lee, no one's in here."

"Damn, man. I thought for sure you were getting laid."

"Shut up."

He laughs and shrugs. "Come on. Let's go."

"Go where?"

"I don't know. Anywhere. I'm feeling the need to get out."

"Why do I have to go?"

He rolls his eyes. "Don't be such a downer. I'm bored."

Shit.

"Fine. Okay. Let me get some clothes on."

He grins and claps his hands together. "Hell yeah. We'll go in five."

I nod and close the door. Not being able to help myself, I grab my phone and check Low out one last time, both loving and hating how much she makes my heart ache for her.

_Damn, _I'm fucked.


	6. life is but a dream

**Low makes my heart happy. **

**Ideas are forming in my head, and I have too much on my plate, but I don't know if I can stop myself. I just miss this family tremendously.**

* * *

Chapter 5  
**life is but a dream**

-HM-

The days have been so long in between snippets and small beautiful chats with Jasper. It drives me crazy that I can't stare at his gorgeous face - in person - every day all day. _Literally _crazy.

I wish I could just lean across the tall desk where he sits all week and kiss the crap out of him. I want to know what his lips feel like on my lips. I just know it would be the most perfect thing in the world to lick and taste his lovely mouth .

It makes me so happy that Seth's sloppiness only made me _die_ for a touch of Jasper's perfectness.

We got back from California two days ago, and I've been hoping to come up with an excuse to go to dad's office, so I can see Jasper. How mean of me to use dad as an excuse to see the love of my life, but I can hardly bear another second without hearing his voice. It's such a deep, masculine sound that just wraps around my heart and makes me want to _love_ him forever and ever.

I feel silly and stupid at how hard I'm crushing on Jasper, but to me, it's _more_ than a crush. He's life changing. He made first kisses meaningless, so that second - _last - _kisses could be _unforgettable. _

If I have to, I'll wait forever for that kiss even though I'll go absolutely nuts the entire time. I just know it will be worth the wait.

_I know it._

The idea to take dad lunch pops in my head and once it's there, I go with it.

I _have _to or I'll just die.

Mom is totally going to know what I'm up to, but I take a shot anyway.

Grabbing a chair, I pull it up next to her and sit down on the patio. "Mom, I'm going to take dad lunch."

"Oh really?"

She totally has my number, but I continue with plan anyway. "I'm sure he's hungry." I don't meet her eyes, but I can tell she's staring at me in that _mom knows it all _way. She's so smart and pretty.

I so, so _badly_ want to see Jasper.

I peek a glance at her and she's smiling at the screen of her laptop. "I packed him a lunch."

Of course I knew that already, and I'm not against whining at this point. "Mom. Jasper is just soooooooooo cute."

He _really _is.

_So _cute.

"What about Seth? He's closer to your age, babe."

_I want Jasper._

"I like Seth." I'm not lying. I do like him, but just as a person. He's _not _Jasper. I'm not going to marry Seth. "He's nice, but Jasper, _gosh_, he's beautiful, Mom."

"Low, your dad would have a stroke."

He so would. _Crazy dad._ I love how much he loves us and how much he protects all of us, but he has to know I'm going to find a boy to love someday.

Like _today._

"I know. I just want to say hi. It's not like I'm going to ask him out. That's crazy. I bet he has a pretty college girlfriend anyway."

_I would die!_

Mom sighs, and I hold back my squeal when I know she's about to give in. She's the freaking best. "Take your dad some cookies. Take a little extra. Just say hi and then spend a little time with your dad. Take Max with you."

"Okay. MAX! We won't be gone long." I kiss mom's cheek and try not to act like a lovesick idiot and run into the house. I fill a container with the cookies mom made today before running upstairs to look in the mirror, making sure I don't have anything on my face.

When I get back downstairs Max is eating a cookie while he waits for me. "What are we doing?"

"Mom's letting me take dad some cookies."

"Oh, _dad_, huh? Okay," Max says sarcastically, making me laugh.

He follows me out, and I place the cookies on the back seat for safekeeping. I mean, I only want to _see_ Jasper, but now that the cookies are part of the plan, they have to be whole and presentable. Mom would so freak out if I offered broken, crumbly cookies.

"Let me drive," Max says, nodding like it's a good idea.

"No way," I snort. "Dad would kill us."

"Yeah, you're right."

Like always, I let him pick the music.

…

Max opens the door for me, smirking over his shoulder, and I bump him with mine as I walk by.

I love my brother.

When my eyes land on my _husband to be_ I nearly fall dead on the spot.

_He got a haircut!_

It's still so pretty and blonde, but just a little shorter and combed all messy and _oh my gosh._

"Low, hey girl," the man of my dreams says all _dreamily._ "What's up, Max?"

"What's up," Max says. "Is dad back there?"

Jasper nods, and I smile and hold up the container of cookies like a big dork. "Mom made cookies."

He grins, and I catch Max rolling his eyes before he heads down the hallway to dad's office, which means I only have _seconds _to convince Jasper to marry me. I mean, to give him a cookie or two.

I walk to the counter, and he stands, his blue eyes looking like the blue ocean of waves trying to drown me.

_I'm not afraid of drowning in Jasper._

"You're not allergic to nuts are you? Mom put pecans." I grab two - my hands are freaking shaking - and hold them out to him.

His fingers _touch _mine!

_Oh my gosh._

"I'm not allergic. Thanks, Low."

I feel like I'm going to hyperventilate. I watch him take a big bite, mesmerized by the way his mouth moves as he chews, so when dad calls my name, I'm not expecting it and jump a mile off the ground. Jasper chokes and laughs, and now I'm humiliated.

I look back at dad, and he has that _look_.

I close the container, and Jasper says quietly, "Really, _thanks _Low. These are good."

I smile shyly even though my mouth wants to break out into the biggest creepy clown smile.

I _love_ his voice.

_Love it!_

"Babe," dad says impatiently.

"Bye, Jasper."

"See ya, girl."

_Marry me._

When I walk to dad, he's kind of glaring at Jasper over my shoulder, but he pulls me to his side with an arm around my neck and kisses my head. "He's too old for you, Low," he grumps, seriously.

"What!" I laugh, looking up into his unhappy eyes. "Dad, I just gave him cookies."

_And _my heart.

* * *

-JW-

This girl, she's going to make me fucking crazy. First lunch, now cookies. Just damn. Fucking _damn._

Masen is not happy his pretty girl is showering me with her love. I want it. I want it so fucking bad.

I eat the second cookie while Low and Max visit with Masen, and Mrs. Masen knows what the hell she's doing. These are good.

I'm on the phone when Masen appears with his son and my girl - yeah, I'm stupid enough to claim her without _claiming _her - and I want to hang up and grab Low and taste those upturned lips.

I guess she doesn't see the way her dad is glaring at her because she doesn't take her eyes off me. I guess I don't care the way he's glaring at me because I can't fucking look away.

When she waves, I wave back.

When she smiles, my lips and my fucking heart smile back.

_She's killing me._

The second she's out the door, I want to beg her to come back. I feel stupid and weird and all kinds of fucked up, but _shit_, she's mine.

I want her to be.

Even though she already is.

_Fuck._

I get back to work and finish up this phone call. I don't even know what it's about anymore, so we start over even though the guy is annoyed as hell.

Masen gives me the look of death when he strides back in the lobby, but other than that, the day drags on without any other incidents of home baked cookies and pretty girls.

I pick up dinner on the way home, so Liam doesn't complain. We still don't have the cooking shit down even though I now have more money to buy what we need. Liam helps, too. He is miserable working with Marcus but hasn't found anything better at this point.

I thought I'd move out on my own, but I feel like shit leaving Liam to pay rent alone. Yeah, he can be annoying as shit with his loud music and the stream of girls he brings by, but I don't want to screw him over like that.

He's not home when I push inside the apartment, so I eat a few pieces of pizza before jumping in the shower. My thoughts stray to dark hair, sun kissed skin and big brown eyes, and I hate what it does to my body. I feel like a fucking sicko, but I don't touch myself, just bang my head on the fucking wall a few hundred times.

Low's not a girl you secretly jack off to in the shower - like a fucking pervert - but one you kiss and love for eternity.

Shit, I've lost my fucking mind.

She makes me feel crazy.

I finish my shower and get dressed before throwing myself face down on my lonely bed. I want to grab my phone and stare at her. I want to fucking friend her and _talk _to her. I really fucking want to taste her lips and see if they taste as good as I imagine they will.

Masen would fire me for sure.

I think it'd be worth it.

Fuck yeah, I'm sure of it.

…

"Shit, man. That's the girl that gave me the finger." Liam points across the store at the girl who's standing at the checkout counter. "Fuck, she's seriously hot. Wait, damn, is that her boyfriend?"

I want to say _she's too young_ but how fucking stupid would I sound. Low is _17_, and I want to steal her from her parents and make her my wife. _Right now._

That's some crazy shit.

"Let's go say hi."

My eyes widen, and I yank on his arm. "Are you fucking serious?"

He laughs and pulls from my grip. "Yeah. You can stay here and lurk." He takes off and I do fucking stay here and lurk.

Liam taps her on the shoulder, and she turns around, no recognition in her eyes. Liam talks her up, and the boy with her rolls his eyes and walks off, leaving her free game for my cousin's taking.

I grab the rest of the shit we need and wait for Liam to get done. When he finally turns away, he's smirking and holds his phone up, showing me he got her number.

"How old is she?" I ask.

"She says 19." He glances over his shoulder. "I'm going to hit the hell out of that ass."

I chuckle and shake my head as he grabs the basket and pushes it through the store, grabbing shit we don't even need.

"Stop, Lee. We don't fucking need these." I shove the wipes back onto the shelf, but he grabs them back and throws them in.

"What do you expect me to wipe my ass with? A leaf? _Your _sock? We're camping, we need fucking wipes."

Shit, he has a point.

We're going camping for the weekend before it gets too cold, and I could use a distraction from work, school..._Low._

She's the good kind of distraction. She's stopped by the office two more times since she brought me cookies, but she was with her mom, and all I got was bright smiles and dreamy eyes.

It was enough to steal my fucking heart.

I'm gone.

_So_ fucking gone for her.


	7. crazy for you

**I feel like I can't get to more interaction FAST enough. I'm going crazy, and I love my Maximoose.**

* * *

Chapter 6  
**crazy for you**

-HM-

I'm doodling Jasper's name - so embarrassing but I can't help it - on the front of my notebook when I hear the girls whispering behind me. I hear my name intermingled with the words _tease_, _bitch_ and _slut_, and I stiffen and peek over my shoulder. They laugh when they notice me, and my face heats up like an inferno.

Girls are so _mean_.

Now that they've ruined my day, I shove my notebook to the side and watch the clock until the bell rings. Mr. Minkus reminds us of a paper due this Friday, and I grab my stuff and rush out of the room.

I've never understood the whole mean girl thing. I've even seen the movie. It's totally not cool to be mean to people for no reason, and I didn't even do _anything _to those girls, and I'm nothing like the words they were calling me.

One of them, _Senna_, bumps me from behind, and it makes me so mad. I don't want to fight because I've never done that before, and I don't even know if I _could_. I glare at her and she laughs. "Seth was right. You _are_ a bitch."

My mouth falls open, and they laugh harder before leaving me standing in the middle of the hallway. I knew Seth was mad that I only wanted to be friends, but I never in my whole life thought he'd say such mean things about me.

I would have never thought to tell people he gave sloppy kisses, and he's going around school spreading those things about me.

I seriously feel like crying.

The hall is crowded, and I push my way through to get to my locker. I'm trying so freaking hard not to cry. I shouldn't even care what people say about me, but Seth is my best friend's brother and he's being freaking _mean._

I grab my math book and slam my locker so hard, making Max - who has just snuck up on me - raise his eyebrows before they furrow in concern. "What's wrong, Low?" He asks, pushing closer into my space.

I look up at him and shake my head, but even though I'm the older one, he gives me a look, forcing me to tell him why I'm upset. When I'm done, he looks so mad, madder than I thought he would be. He looks around the hallway, and I get kind of scared because is he looking for _Seth_?

"I'll be right back," he says, eyes staring off over my shoulder.

He pushes past me, and I follow his back until I see him shoving Seth into a row of lockers and pull his arm back to punch him right in the face.

_Oh my gosh!_

I run after him to try and stop him. I don't want him getting into trouble over a dumb, mean boy who gives gross kisses, but then Seth punches my brother in the face, and I see red. I bump into a few people as I try to make it to both of them, and when I do, I stupidly grab Seth's hair - I don't know why I go for his hair - and yank on it hard and then punch him right in the nose. The crunch makes me cringe, but the blood makes me want to puke.

"Shit, Low," Max grunts, pulling me away from the dirty betrayer.

"That's enough!" Mr. Barnette yells, blowing his whistle, making us cringe. "To the office now! Even you Mr. Clearwater."

Max pulls me so far away from Seth and pushes us through the crowd. I look up at him and see the red mark on his cheek. "Are you okay?"

He looks down at me, his eyes so angry. "Are _you_ okay?"

I burst into tears, and Max hugs me.

Behind me, I hear Leah accuse Seth. "What did you do?"

"Shut up, Leah."

_You _shut up, Seth!

…

Seth glares at us as he leaves Principal Bennett's office with his mom. She gives me a sad smile and cups my cheek before following him.

Max just glowers at both of them.

"Max. Harlow. Join me in my office." We both stand and step through as she holds the door open, then take seats in front of her desk. "I'm going to get your mother on the phone."

I nod, and Max slouches in his chair, arms crossed, still so angry. It warms my heart that he's mad on my behalf. He's _such_ a good brother.

"Mrs. Masen, hello. This is Principal Bennett down at the high school. I'm well, thank you. We ran into a problem with Max and Harlow today. I'm going to need you to come down. Are you available?"

I bite my lip as Principal Bennett's eyes narrow and she continues speaking to mom. "There was a confrontation between Max and another student."

Max huffs in annoyance, and I glance at him to see him glaring at Principal Bennett. We're already in so much trouble, and he's going to make it worse. "Max…"

"Mrs. Masen, if you could come down, we can talk about this in person. Both Max and Harlow are waiting for you in my office. Yes, thank you."

She hangs the phone up and steeples her fingers together, hard eyes on my brother and me. "I'll have to suspend you both for three days. There is no tolerance against fighting."

"What's the tolerance about calling my sister…"

She holds her hands up. "Seth's punishment is just as severe as the both of yours."

Max stays silent, but his eyes show how mad he is still.

We sit in uncomfortable silence for ten minutes before mom shows up. The door opens, and I look over my shoulder at mom who looks so worried.

"Are you okay?" She asks, her hands gently rubbing our heads. I feel so much better now that she's here, but I'm so embarrassed about why Max fought Seth in the first place. I could never be a tease like those girls were saying. I never _asked_ to be kissed.

"Mrs. Masen," Principal Bennett interrupts before either Max or I could answer mom. "Max was involved in a fight with another student. There is a no tolerance policy when it comes to physical violence."

I cringe when mom asks Max what happened. He glares at Principal Bennett before glancing at me and looking back at mom. "I got into a fight with Seth." He pauses, letting out a breath. "He was spreading rumors about Low, and he made her cry, so I punched him."

"What rumors?"

I shake my head, but he doesn't listen to me.

"He called Low a slut, saying she was just a tease, and I didn't like that." He crosses his arms over his chest and dares mom to get mad at him for defending me.

He's so freaking sweet.

"Mom. Can we just go? We're suspended for three days."

"What! Why are you suspended?" Mom looks down at me, and I feel my lips lifting, kind of proud that I could defend Max like he defended me.

"Well, after he hit Max, I pulled his hair and punched him in the nose."

Mom shakes her head, but I see the way her eyes light up. "I hope Seth is getting the same punishment."

Principal Bennett stands, saying, "Without a doubt. Harlow and Max will both be able to make up tomorrow, Friday and Monday's work when they come back."

We grab Maddox and leave the office to mom mumbling _what the heck is wrong with that boy_ and then she says, "Your dad's going to be so mad at him."

"It's not like he's going to ever come to our house again," Max says, walking close to me.

I agree. I would be okay not ever seeing Seth again, but I know there's no way to avoid him when his sister is my best friend.

Boys are so stupid.

Maybe not _all _boys.

…

Mom's freaking out because Max has his first date, and if we really sit back and think about this, he's having his first date _before_ even me. Going to the movies with Seth _and _Leah was not a date. On a date, the boy pays for your ticket at the movie and then pays for your popcorn and drink. Seth did none of that. He didn't even invite me. Leah did, and _I _drove.

I feel horribly, absolutely stupid that I let Seth ruin memorable moments like that.

Seth, who is not allowed to be mentioned in our house anymore or Max and dad start getting all huffy and puffy and mad.

It makes me laugh. I'm completely over the rumor spreading and name calling. He can say whatever he wants. All it does is make him look desperate and dumb. I know I'm none of those things, and it's been _weeks_, so no one else even cares what he says either.

I help Max get ready. Okay, well, I just comb his unruly hair for him. He's so cute, acting all shy, and I'm just glad it's Ryeligh he's going on a date with. She's a nice girl. He needs a nice girl.

I follow him down the stairs and giggle when mom says, "You look adorable, babe."

"Mom." Max groans. "I don't want to look 'adorable'."

I laugh and pat his shoulder. "Well, she's not going to call you hot."

"Haha." He makes a face and rolls his eyes.

Dad hands over some money, and mom looks like she's about to cry when Max opens the door and drives off to his very first date.

I'm with mom. Little Maximoose is growing up.

"Low, babe," dad calls, and I look up from the couch. "I'm going to take your mom for a milkshake. Will you keep an eye on the boys?"

Mom's pregnant, and she thinks we don't know it. It's so obvious with her little growing belly she tries to hide and her cravings. We - not with cute little blabbermouth Maddox - talk about it all the time when she's not around, and I'm so freaking excited to have another baby in the house. My only wish is to have an adorable little sister that I can dress up in the cutest little clothes.

_I can't wait._

"Sure, dad. Will you bring us some ice cream back?"

"Of course," he says, kissing the top of my head.

When they leave, the boys come downstairs with a deck of _Uno_ cards, and we let Maddox win most of the games because it's so cute when he jumps up and throws his hands in the air, dancing around the living room.

After _Uno_, Leo puts on a movie, and we pile onto the couch, waiting for mom, dad, and ice cream.

I'm only a little jealous that Max is out, and I'm not.

At this point, the only boy I want to go out with is Jasper, and I don't know if that will ever happen. I want it so badly, but do I ask him out? Would he even say yes? I mean, I don't know how he could ever possibly turn down his soulmate, but maybe he doesn't believe in that like I do.

I can't even count how many times I've been by the office, only getting a deep hello and a beautiful smile before mom's pushing me down the hall or dad's dragging me into his office.

I think he gets even more beautiful every time I see him. It's crazy - just _so _crazy - how much my heart wants him.

_Gosh_, I dream of the day where his lips meet mine, and he forever ruins me for anyone else's lips but his.

* * *

-JW-

I passed my first semester of courses, and that's a fucking relief. I didn't think college would be so difficult but working full-time and going to school at night is a bitch. I like that they're web-based, and I only have to go to the school three times a week, but still, it's hard.

Tonight was the last night until January, and I'll get a few weeks off for the Christmas break. I've never been more ready for a break than I am now.

I push my way into the hall and almost bump into a girl that's in my English class who I've caught giving me looks like she wants me to give her some attention, but I just nod and keep walking past her.

Low Masen has ruined me.

Fucking _ruined _me.

She's made me fall on my face with little interaction and sparkling heart eyes. I'm obsessed with her. I have an unhealthy obsession with my boss' daughter, and if he knew how much I think about her, he'd probably want to kill me.

When I walk into the apartment, my eyes fucking burn from seeing Liam's bare ass as he fucks some girl on our couch. "Are you fucking kidding me," I shout, averting my eyes and bypassing the kitchen just so I can go to my room.

Fuck food. Liam ruined my appetite.

"Shit." Liam pauses and laughs, looking over his shoulder, and I flip him off before making it to my room and slamming the door.

"You have a bed, asshole," I yell through the door and pound on it once.

"You're distracting me, man. Shut up," he calls back, and I fucking laugh.

He's so stupid.

Stripping out of my clothes, I pull on a pair of sweats and kick back in bed. I don't want to say what I do next, but…

Low's page is still _public_, and I pull up her profile like the stalker I am and groan when I see an adorable picture of her and Maddox. It was only posted an hour ago, and _shit_, I need to get a fucking life.

Tossing my phone aside, I push a pillow into my face and groan, despising myself for wanting her so fucking bad I can't even think half the time.

I fuck up at work when she walks in, and I fuck up at work when she walks out. I _really _fuck up when she doesn't come at all, and she doesn't even come that often. I'm surprised Masen has kept me this long.

I hear the front door shut and then Liam knocks on my door before pushing it open and making himself at home on my bed.

"Dude, you almost fucked shit up," he complains, grinning like a sex sated asshole.

"Why the fuck would you do that on the couch?"

He smirks. "She was so hot, and I was so horny I couldn't wait another damn second to wreck her ass."

Rolling my eyes, I grab the remote, clicking the T.V. on. "Who was she?"

"My fuck you girl," he chuckles and rolls to his back, stealing my pillows and my space.

"Fuck you girl?"

"Yeah, the one who gave me the finger." He bites his lip and shudders. "_Damn._"

"Well, do that shit in your room. I'm traumatized after seeing that shit."

He snorts and fluffs _my _pillow. "Put on _The Voice. _I missed it last week."

I toss him the remote and let him steal my shit.

My fingers itch to grab my phone, but I stuff them beneath my head and fall asleep to Liam singing _Rise Up_ in the worse pitch I've ever heard.


	8. i belong to your heart

**My fingers can't get Jasper and Low together FAST ENOUGH! I love the pining though...sweet!**

* * *

Chapter 7  
**i belong to your heart**

-HM-

I cannot _believe _mom is having a baby girl. It's a freaking miracle after all the brothers she's blessed me with. I love the crap out of them but having another girl in the house is going to be _so_ amazing.

Mom put the sonogram picture up on the fridge and sometimes I just pretend I need something to eat so I can stare at the adorable little peanut.

I cannot _wait _to meet her and cuddle her and love her.

The minute mom came home with the news, I went crazy and picked out so many cute outfits for her already and now we're at the mall so mom can pick out more. Violet and I left mom and Aunt Rose shopping because we got hungry. My favorite place to eat is at the mall. _So _many choices, and I don't even have to make a choice, I can just choose a little something from every place.

Violet quietly eats across from me as I have a debate inside my head whether or not to click _request_ on Jasper's Instagram profile. Dad would kill me if he knew I was trying to _friend _Jasper.

There's really no harm of being friends on Instagram, though.

Everybody's friends on Instagram.

That's what Instagram is for.

I bite my lip, my finger hovering nervously over that precious button. I just so badly want to see more of him and his beautiful hair and his even more beautiful face.

I want to know if he has a girlfriend, so if he does, I can move on with this unhealthy obsession I have with him.

Okay, no, I'll still be obsessed.

_So obsessed._

"There's mom and Auntie," Violet says.

Before putting my phone away, I quickly hit _request_ and feel about a billion butterflies going crazy in my stomach.

What if he denies it?

_I will die._

"Mom!" I call across the food court when she doesn't sport us right away. I wave her over and try to be calm.

_Everything is fine. I just sent Jasper a friend request on Instagram, and he will deny it because he has a beautiful girlfriend who he is in love with, and my heart will be shattered. No biggie._

"Did you buy the entire court," Aunt Rose asks, sliding in next to Violet, making her giggle.

"Low said Auntie would be _starving_."

Mom kiss my head and digs in, not denying how hungry she is. She's always hungry.

My phone vibrates in my lap, and my heart stutters.

"What did you buy for my little baby?" I ask, trying to ignore the notification on my phone. Maybe it's not even him. It could just be some other type of notification. I pull things out of the bag for my baby girl and even for Maddox, telling mom how adorable it all is. "I love this, mom. Gosh, I can't wait until she's here. I think I'm more excited than dad."

I glance down at the black screen of my phone wanting so badly to see if it was Jasper's _acceptance _of my request, but then Aunt Rose says something about them moving back to Fork's, and I'm distracted for a moment.

"No way," I gush. "That would be so cool."

"It's not for sure_,_ but I am working on your uncle."

It really would be cool to have them all back here.

"So, Low, any cute boys in your life?"

Aunt Rose gives mom a look, and I know mom's given her some gossip about my life.

"There is one," I say, glancing at mom. "He's so cute."

"Ooohhh, what's his name?" Violet asks.

I look at mom again, and she's smiling while stuffing her face with a cheeseburger.

"Jasper."

_Also known as my future husband._

Looking down at my phone, I click the home screen and pull up Instagram and go to my notifications, my heart like a rock in my throat.

_He accepted and requested!_

I excitedly accept his request, _of course_, and feel like my life is now complete.

"Let's get home to my boys," mom says, and I close out my phone again.

_Gosh, _I can't wait to see his face again.

* * *

-JW-

I'm a fucking idiot.

I never should have accepted her request to follow me. I never should have followed her back. Now, I have instant access - with permission - to her gorgeous face whenever the hell I want.

And, _fuck me_, she's the prettiest damn thing I've ever seen.

She's also still 17.

And my boss' daughter.

Who is off limits.

But who is also going to be my fucking wife.

You'll see.

"Dude!" Liam yells, banging on the door, interrupting me from my sweet obsession of Low. "Are we going to go or what?"

Groaning, I roll off my bed and pull my bedroom door open. "I changed my mind. I'm not going."

His face falls, and I feel a little bad, but I just want to kick back and relax today and not deal with anyone.

The holidays kicked my ass and now that school started back up, I never get a damn break.

_And I want to obsess over Low in peace._

"You suck, Jas. I told Heidi you were coming."

"What the fuck? Now I'm really not going. I don't want her."

Liam slaps my shoulders, shaking me. "You haven't gotten laid in months, man. You need to release some of that pent up tension."

_Shit,_ if he only knew why I was so fucking tense.

_Her name is Low, Lee, and she's a fucking dream._

"No thanks," I say. "Maybe next time."

He rolls his eyes and takes off, leaving me to pine for my beautiful girl, and that's what I'm doing, fucking _pining._

I pine while I nuke my corn dogs.

I pine while I flip through Netflix and find not shit to watch.

I fucking pine when I scroll through the pictures of her, sometimes alone, sometimes with her brothers or two dogs and even a fucking pig. She's making kissy lips at its snout, and my chest fucking squeezes.

I want those kissy lips on my lips.

I want those lips all fucking over me.

I want to marry those plump lips and kiss them for fucking ever.

"Fuck." I groan and bash myself in the face with a pillow a few times. I need to get a grip. Maybe I _do _need to get laid.

But, why does my chest hurt thinking about fucking some random girl, though?

_Because you want Low so damn bad, you can't think of nothing else, asshole!_

What is my girl doing to me?

She's reeling me in without even knowing it. Those sweet smiles and innocent brown eyes are unravelling me completely, and I fucking welcome that shit.

_Wreck me, girl._

* * *

-HM-

"No girls…" Dad looks at Max then he gives me his best dad stare. "Definitely no _boys_."

"Dad," I say, patting his arm. "We know. Don't worry, everything will be fine."

Max crosses his arms and grins, bumping me with this big shoulder. "I'll keep them all in line."

Dad chuckles when I roll my eyes, and then he kisses our heads and then mom comes and does the same thing, needing to leave but not wanting to. That's one thing I love most about mom. She's always willing to give up time alone with dad to spend time with us, but dad needs her sometimes, too. The love shines so bright in his eyes when he looks at her, and it just makes me want that kind of love so dang bad.

_Just love me, Jasper!_

"So, a party?" Max teases, and I laugh. We could _never_.

"If you mean _slumber _party then heck yes. Go get the boys. I'll make the snacks and we'll do a movie."

"I'm picking it," Max says before heading upstairs.

"Of course you are!" I yell at his back, and then jump when dad pushes through the door. "Dad, you scared me!"

"Sorry, babe."

"What's wrong?"

"The Hale's are on their way over…"

"What! No…"

"Your mom doesn't feel good about leaving you guys alone overnight."

I _knew _she left too easy.

"I'm 17, dad. I'm responsible. You can trust me."

He grins. "I know, babe, but your mom worries."

I'm not really that irritated, but I used to hate going to the Hale's when I was little. I'm not trying to be mean, but they're just so boring, and they cringe every time the boys get too loud.

"Okay, fine," I say, sighing, not really put out or anything.

"Thanks, Low. Love you."

_Gosh_!

"Love you too. Have fun."

He kisses my head and leaves again, and I go upstairs to give my brothers the bad news.

Maddox is actually excited since Vincent will be with them. I actually forgot about that. At least, Violet can keep me company and we can do girly things.

"Can we still have a sleepover?" Maddox asks, climbing onto my lap. "We can have it in my room!"

"Where will we sleep?" Noah asks.

"In my bed," Maddox shrugs.

"We won't fit," Ollie says.

"You don't have a T.V., Mad dog," Max says.

"I know!" Maddox yells excitedly. "Let's sleep in mommy and daddy's bed!"

I giggle when Leo and Max share a cringy look and then say, "Maybe Max can bring his T.V. to your room."

Max nods. "Yeah, I'll do that."

"I'll help you." Leo follows Max out and the twins go and get blankets and pillows.

"Come on, Mad, you can help me with the snacks."

"Okay, I want all the snacks, okay."

_Me too, Mad!_


	9. hero

**I'm obsessed with these two.**

* * *

Chapter 8  
**hero**

-HM-

"I'm _so _hungry, Low," Maddox says, making me grunt when he jumps onto my stomach. "Are we gonna starve until mommy gets back?"

I tickle his sides, and he giggles and screams trying to fight me off. My little brother knows I can't cook, and Max, the only one of us who can, drove mom to the doctor today. It was only half a day at school, and mom asked me to babysit.

"Lowwwww, _stoooppppppp._" Maddox's face is all red, and he's breathing all hard, and I finally stop tickling him and hug him instead.

"I can make you a sandwich," I tell him, and he scrunches his nose.

"What about nuggets? Mommy just microwaves them."

"Okay, let's go. Will you share?"

He pulls me into the kitchen and climbs onto a stool while I grab the bag from the freezer.

"Make a lot a lot," he orders, leaning on his elbows.

I laugh and make enough for all of us. When they're almost done, Maddox runs upstairs to get Noah and Ollie.

After lunch, I pick up the mess while Maddox plays video games with the twins. I can hear him screaming in excitement all the way downstairs, and he's the cutest little boy I've ever seen.

Mom texts that everything went good at the doctor, and I still can't believe I'm getting a sister in a few months. She's going to be so spoiled.

After the hard work of throwing paper plates away and wiping the counters - cleaning is my worst nightmare _ever _\- I throw myself onto the couch and pull up Jasper's Instagram. Now that we're officially friends, I get to stare at his beautiful face any time I want.

And I _do_ all of the time.

Nobody knows about my crush on Jasper, not even Leah. I feel bad not telling her but I love that Jasper's my little secret that I get to keep him to myself and obsess over him like a weirdo without people finding out.

I mean, mom _knows_, but we don't talk about it even though sometimes I want to just gush and go on about how lovely and cute and _hot_ he is, but she's already told me dad would freak and that he's too old.

_When they're your soulmate, they can _never _be too old._

_Never!_

Plus, dad is like _six _years older than mom.

_Six!_

Jasper's only 20. That's only three years. That's _nothing._

It's _so _nothing that I click on my messages and bring up his profile, kind of scared but kind of not caring _at all_. Talking to him will hurt nothing, and I want to talk to him so bad I can't even stand it any more.

With butterflies in my stomach, and my heart pounding so freaking hard, I type out my first ever message to my future husband.

Oh my _gosh_, I'll remember this moment forever.

**low.m: hi**

I should have said something better than _hi_ like a dork, but oh well, this is me. He's going to love me for me.

Gosh, I hope he answers me.

I will die if not.

**jasper.w: hey girl. what's up?**

_Oh my gosh!_

* * *

-JW-

Masen looks harassed as he walks a client - Mr. Lewis - from the hallway. I know what he feels like. That guys a pain in the ass who I've had to deal with on the phone too many times to count.

"I look forward to hearing from you," the annoying as hell man says as the phone rings.

I know this is my job, but answering the phone is the worst part of it. You never know who's going to be on the other end and if I'm going to know what the fuck to do when they ask me shit I should probably know.

"Masen Contracting…"

The sound of Max's voice on the other end almost stops my fucking heart. I can't understand anything he's saying because he's talking too fast and crying. "Max, wait, calm down…"

Suddenly the phone's no longer in my hands and Masen is barking into it, his face full of concern.

_What the fuck is going on?_

"Max, I love you. Just wait for me."

He tosses me the receiver and ignores me when I ask if everything's okay. Shit, I hope Low's okay.

Fuck, what if she's not.

I feel so fucking anxious, wondering what the fuck is going on. I can't even concentrate on whatever the hell I'm supposed to be doing, and I know I'm supposed to be doing shit because that's my job. To do shit.

Finally, Garrett stops by to tell me Mrs. Masen and Max were in a car accident, and my heart fucking stops.

_Low._

Damn, she's probably a fucking wreck right now. I want to leave this stupid fucking office and go to her and hug her, fucking comfort her, but how weird would that be?

I try to get back to work, fielding phone calls and shit, but I can't even fucking focus.

What if Low's mom _dies_?

I see the way that entire family is, and they wouldn't survive that kind of tragedy.

My phone pings on the desk, and I give it a distracted glance before doing a double take and fisting the damn thing.

_Low sent you a message._

Low sent me a message?

_Holy fuck._

With shaking hands - I'm totally that bitch right now - I open the message.

**low.m: hi**

A quick glance at the clock says she's still at school. _High school. _Does she not know what the fuck is going on right now?

I don't even think about shit when I respond back to her.

**jasper.w: hey girl. what's up?**

Fuck, she shouldn't be messaging me. I shouldn't be _responding._

Her dad is going to rip my balls off and shove them down my throat.

_Why doesn't she know what the fuck is going on right now? _

**low.m: is it weird for me to messaging you?**

_Fuck no, but yes!_

Goddamn, she's making me feel like a nervous bitch.

**jasper.w: no. are you okay?**

There's no way she knows about her mom. She wouldn't be messaging me if she knew her mom was seriously hurt.

The office phone rings, and like an irresponsible fuck, I ignore it instead I scroll through Low's page, still getting that sick fuck feeling, but doing it anyway. Just _damn,_ she's too pretty to be wanting to talk to me.

**low.m: yes. school was out early. i'm babysitting my brothers.**

_Shit._

_Why the fuck hasn't Masen told her?_

_Why are you messaging me, Low?_

_Why do I want to hug and kiss your pretty face right now?_

Fuck, she's going to be so fucking devastated.

**jasper.w: i think your dad is going to be pissed when he finds out your messaging me.**

**low.m: you're just my friend, jasper.**

**jasper.w: am i?**

**low.m: you are. instagram says so.**

I grin and shake my head. She's fucking cute.

I want to be _more _than her friend and that's not going to happen.

_Not yet._

But I am going to marry this gorgeous girl.

**jasper.w: true.**

**low.m: i see you don't have a girlfriend. what is your dog's name?**

**jasper.w: i don't, and my dog's name is iron. short for iron man. he lives with my parents. are you stalking me, low?**

She's totally stalking me, and it's so damn hot.

_Shut up, Jasper._

**low.m: i don't have a boyfriend.**

_Girl._

**low.m: we have two dogs. thor and loki.**

I crack up.

Thor.

Loki.

_Iron Man._

I knew she was meant for me.

**jasper.w: avengers fan?**

**low.m: yes. but i didn't name them. max did. i wanted to call one barbie.**

God, she's fucking cute.

**jasper.w: that's cute.**

**low.m: did you just call me cute?**

Don't do this, Low. Don't flirt with me. I can't fucking take it.

**jasper.w: your obsession with barbies is cute.**

**low.m: so you think i'm ugly?**

**jasper.w: fuck no. **

**low.m: i think you're cute too, j.**

Fuck, don't nickname me. She's going to be the reason her dad's in prison if she doesn't cut that adorable shit.

_Please don't cut that adorable shit, beautiful girl._

**jasper.w: you're crazy.**

_I'm crazy. _Crazy for this girl I barely know, who is totally off fucking limits and who looks like the sweetest angel I've ever seen. She's a good girl who's making me think very bad things.

When an hour passes without a response, I know she's heard the news about her mom.

_Fuck._

* * *

-HM-

Aunt Rose just went back to find mom and dad, and I've never been more scared in my life. Uncle Emmett is here with us, and I can't stop the constant tears from falling from my eyes. Maddox snuggles in my arms, and I squeeze him so tight.

_What if mom doesn't make it? What would we do without her?_

Leo looks horrible. I grab his hand, and he looks at me like he wants to just fall apart.

_I hate it._

"She'll be okay," I tell him, squeezing his hand so tight.

"I want mommy," Maddox says.

_Me too._

My phone vibrates in my pocket, and I pull it out to check who it is. Uncle Emmett showed up when I was talking to Jasper, and I couldn't think of _anything _but mom being hurt and how devastated I was.

**jasper.h: she'll be okay, low. i fucking know it.**

I close my eyes and pray so hard Jasper's right.

I hear Leo whisper dad's name as he jerks away from me. I open my eyes and see him.

"Dad," I cry, standing with Maddox in my arms, the tears pouring so fast down my face. "Where's mom? Is she okay?"

_Please, dad, say she's okay._

Dad wraps his arms around _all _of us, and it doesn't make me feel any better. I want mom to be okay. I want her to be here calling us her _babies_ and loving us like she always does every single day.

"Aunt Rose said she's going to be okay," I say through my tears, lifting Maddox higher in my arms. "Can we see her?"

Dad shakes his head, and I feel like my heart is going to fall right out of my chest. He kisses my head and pulls me into his arms. "She's resting, babe, so she can wake up and get better."

"Daddy!" Maddox reaches for dad, and dad pulls him from my arms. "Take me to mommy. I know she misses me."

Dad looks devastated, and when Ollie and Noah burrow their way into his sides, he closes his eyes, and I cry harder.

Uncle Emmett ushers us all to our seats, and we crowd dad and then I see Max in the doorway and jump back up, rushing to my poor brother. "Are you okay?" I wrap my arms around him, hugging him so tight. He's all bruised up, and my heart is hurting so bad. "Oh my God, we were so worried about you. Come sit down."

I hold Max's hand as dad tries to explain what's going on. Max is shaking and halfway through, Maddox leaves dad to climb onto Max's lap, always knowing who needs his little love most.

When dad stands, I follow him. "Go dad. I'll take care of everyone here. Mom needs you." I swallow so hard and sniffle, barely being able to see through the tears just sitting in my eyes. "Tell her we love her."

He pulls me into a hug, and then I feel my brothers behind us making one big giant group hug. I feel the shaking in dad's chest, and I squeeze my eyes shut tight.

When dad leaves, Max follows him.

Maddox cuddles with Uncle Emmett, and I wipe my tears away and pull out my phone and send Jasper a message.

**low.m: i hope so. we can't live without her.**

When Aunt Rose comes back out, we go home to a home that is _not_ a home without mom, dad, and Max in it.


	10. a moment like this

**I'm so glad we're getting past this part.**

* * *

Chapter 9  
**a moment like this**

-HM-

Mom's been in a coma for three days, and we freaking miss her so much. Everyone's just so sad and scared and it's been so different without her here. _Without _dad and Max here.

My heart hurts for my brother. I was so little but still I remember when him and I decided he would share his daddy with me, and I would share my mommy with him. We're so lucky to have them and each other and there is _no_ way we want to lose any part of them. _Ever._

These past three days have been just horrible. We're all taking it hard, but poor Leo is devastated and so scared. He hasn't left my side and now that Uncle Emmett is taking us to see mom, he's freaking out.

"Go ahead and text your dad," Uncle Emmett says, and I hear Leo suck in air.

_Poor Leo._

**uncle em says we'll be there soon.**

**dad: okay babe.**

We stopped and picked up flowers and everyone at home signed the card Maddox drew. He was so mad he didn't get to come with us but dad said he didn't want the younger boys to have to see mom like she is.

_What _does _she look like?_

I don't know that Leo and I can handle seeing her broken either. We're so used to mom being so lovable and happy. How can she be anything different?

**i love you. we brought flowers. maddox made mom a card and we all signed it.**

**dad: i love you too. mom's going to love it.**

She really is going to. When she wakes up, she's going to be so happy.

**i know, huh. i can't wait to see her. leo's sad today. not that he hasn't been sad, but he's so nervous to see mom. he wants her awake so bad. we all do.**

**dad: she's getting better. see you soon.**

Uncle Emmett's pulling into the parking lot as I send Jasper a message. We've been talking _nonstop _since the accident, and he's _everything _I imagined.

_Perfect._

He makes me feel so fluttery and breathless and I just love his texting voice just as much as his real voice.

**low.m: good morning, j.**

He replies instantly, like he was just waiting for me, and I _love _that.

**jasper.w: morning, girl.**

My face warms, and I'm in the middle of messaging him back when Uncle Emmett parks and jumps down from the truck.

Putting my phone away, I get out, Leo right behind me. I grab his hand, and he squeezes it so tight. We walk through the automatic doors, and my heart beats nervously in my chest. I'm so anxious to see mom, to make sure she really is okay, but I can't help feeling scared.

"There's Max," Leo murmurs, and I want to cry when I see him looking all defeated.

Uncle Emmett pulls him into a hug, and then he falls into mine and Leo's arms, smashing the flowers I'm holding against me. I have to squeeze my eyes so tight so I don't start crying my eyes out. I can't imagine how he feels. We all know it was an accident, and we don't blame him for _anything_, but I can tell he blames himself.

Max pulls back and says, "I'm getting breakfast…"

"I'll go with you," Uncle Emmett says. "You guys go on back."

We nod, and Max gives me a tired half-hearted smile before following Uncle Emmett to the cafeteria.

I ask the nurse to take us to mom and dad, and Leo's sweaty palm in mine makes my heart pound too fast.

The nice nurse smiles, saying, "Here you are," before heading back the way we came. My eyes feel with tears when I watch dad kissing mom's face and nose, telling her that he loves her.

It's _crushing _me.

"Dad," I call, and he turns his head, smiling small before kissing mom's cheek again and pulling us both into hugs.

I sniffle, and my throat feels like there's a rock stuck in it when I see mom laying so still in the bed, monitors and cords hooked up to her and a cast on her arm and leg.

I glance at Leo, and he just looks so broken hearted, it kills me.

Dad ruffles his hair, and I see the way Leo's throat bobs when he swallows. "She's doing better," dad says, quietly. "A few more days, and we'll get her back."

I move past dad, setting the flowers and card on the little table before grabbing a chair and pulling it to the edge of mom's bed. "Hi, mom," I croak then clear my throat, trying so hard not to start sobbing and begging for her to wake up. "We miss you so much. Ollie, Noah, and especially Maddox were so mad that they couldn't come today." I grab her soft hand in mine. "Maddox wanted me to tell you that he drew the most perfect hearts on your card." I giggle and wipe my nose, and it _hurts._ "He said that you would love them because he made them." I move my eyes to Leo standing next to dad, and he looks like he can barely stand to be in here, but I wave him over anyway. "Leo's here, too."

Leo slowly walks toward me, bumping his leg against the arm of my chair. "Hi, mom," he says, gently taking her hand from mine. He shuffles his feet, kind of scared, and I _hate_ this feeling we're all feeling. We want to hear her voice, see her eyes, her _smile._ We just want all of her back _right_ now.

My eyes find Max's when him and Uncle Emmett stand in the doorway, and I smile as best as I can before telling mom, "Max has been staying here with dad the entire time. He won't leave you, and I know he blames himself for what's happened to you, but we know it was an accident. When you wake up, you'll have to talk some sense into your Maximoose." My voice catches, and I can't help it when I start to cry. It just hurts so much to talk to mom when she can't talk back. I feel Leo wrap his arm around me, whispering, "Low," and I cry harder.

"Good morning." I lift my head and wipe my eyes when the nurse walks in. "Wow, lots of visitors today. I'm here to check our girl over."

I stand and Leo and I step back to the couch with Max. He hugs me, and I deep breathe through my nose.

Uncle Emmett leaves the room while the nurse checks mom over, but the second she says she's getting the doctor to do an ultrasound, my heart feels lighter.

"Gosh, I can't wait to see her moving around in there." I stand behind dad's chair, squeezing the material in my hands.

The nurse comes back with the doctor and the ultrasound machine, and I squeeze dad's shoulders, anxious to see that my baby sister is perfect and healthy.

"Hello," the doctor says, giving us all a distracted glance. "We just want to check and make sure everything is still looking good. I'll start with finding the heartbeats."

_Heartbeats?_

After a few minutes of moving the wand around, the doctor finally says, "There we are." Max and Leo push themselves in next to me, and we listen to the little pounding rhythm of a perfect heartbeat, then there's the sound of two heartbeats going at once. "There we got. I got both of them."

"Oh my God," I squeal, kind of bouncing on my feet.

"No way," Leo laughs, bumping me with his shoulder.

"Dad!" Max grabs dad's shoulder over my hand, shaking him.

"Twins?" Dad asks, so very shocked. Just as shocked as the rest of us.

_Twins!_

"Why yes, Mr. Masen. Your wife is carrying a little girl and a little boy in there. I'm sorry, I thought you knew this."

_Holy crap!_

A _boy_ and a _girl. _Mom is going to freak out when she wakes up.

"No, I didn't know," dad says, staring down at mom, squeezing her hand, looking over his shoulder at us. We're all smiling.

"Happy news, I hope."

"Oh my gosh, yes!" I say, grinning at the old man. _Twins, _dad! Oh my gosh, a boy and a girl. Mom is going to be thrilled. I'm going to have to start shopping for boy clothes. I thought there was only a little baby girl in there. I _love _this." I feel breathless and so freaking happy, and I _know _mom's going to wake up and get better. She's not going to want to miss a second of this.

Dad chuckles, and I _miss _him.

"I can't believe it's twins," Leo says.

"Maddox gets his little brother," Max says.

_Oh my gosh!_

…

"Mom's awake," dad says in my ear, and I squeal and cry and scream for my brothers. It seems like it's been a whole year since I've heard mom's voice.

"We're coming," I say, running up the stairs. "Tell her we'll be right there. I love you, dad."

Dad hangs up and I grab Maddox and he giggles himself silly when I kiss him and tell him, "Mommy's awake. We get to see mommy."

"No way," Noah says, and I nod, happily.

"Go tell Leo and Ollie. We're going to go see her."

Noah runs off down the hall, and Maddox wiggles down and follows him.

I finally feel like I can breathe again.

I _have _to tell Jasper.

Pulling up Instagram, I message him.

**low.m: mom's awake!**

He replies immediately, like he's done every day these past couple of days. He's my exquisite, beautiful obsession.

**jasper.w: that's good news, b.**

_B _as in _Barbie._

Freaking _Barbie._

It's so cute I can hardly stand it.

I don't know how to deal with someone like Jasper. He's only three years and some older than me, but I know dad doesn't like that he's in college and I'm a junior in high school. I mean, not that he knows I'm falling slowly and magically in love with Jasper or anything.

**low.m: we're going to go see her.**

**jasper.w: i'm so fucking glad you're getting your mom back, girl.**

_Gosh, _I want to tell mom about Jasper so bad, but I don't want dad to know, and I don't want her to have to keep secrets from him.

**low.m: i can't wait to see her.**

I wish I could see _you._

I don't know if Jasper feels what I feel when I talk to him, but I feel _everything._

* * *

-JW-

If Masen finds out I'm hooked on his daughter, he's going to kill me. I don't even think it's my age, really. It's more that he can't fucking stand any guy with Low. He's so damn protective of his kids, it's crazy.

Crazy in a good fucking way.

Thank fuck, Low's mom is okay. I don't even want to think about what would have happened to that family had she not made it.

These past few days, I haven't gotten shit done. Harlow has taken over my entire fucking existence at this point, and she's just so damn sweet.

Innocent.

_Fucking perfect._

I want to teach her everything I know.

I want to feel her lips on my lips.

I want her hands on my face while I kiss those same pretty lips.

I just fucking want _her._

She's my sweetest obsession; my secret girl even if she doesn't even know it.

**jasper.w: go be with your mom. talk later?**

**low.m: definitely, j. **

_Damn_, the heart emoji.

If she's trying to reel me in, it's fucking working.

I'm caught on her fucking hook.

**jasper.w: i'll see you when i see you.**

And _fuck_, do I want to see her.


	11. come away with me

**Max kills me.**

* * *

Chapter 10  
**come away with me**

-HM-

Mom's been home for about six weeks and everything has felt somewhat _normal _until yesterday. _Last night_. It's so unbelievable to me, but Max got in trouble at school for having _weed._

I would have never _ever _in my life thought he would do something like that. I know he's been having such a hard time, and I _hate _that he always looks so sad. I want to grab him and shake him and yell at him that it's not his fault, _no one_ blames him for mom getting hurt. Accidents happen all the time.

When we were little, Max's birth mom died and maybe seeing our mom hurt like that, messed with his head.

I couldn't even imagine what he's going through.

Well, last night was the worst night ever since mom got back. Max snuck out of the house, and I did not want him to be in trouble but I _had _to tell dad he left. What if something would have happened to him, and I knew he was gone and didn't tell anyone?

I wouldn't be able to live with myself.

Max looks miserable when I walk into his room.

"Are you mad at me?" I ask, just really freaking hoping he's not.

I sit on the floor beside his bed, feeling so bad about last night, but _really_ there was no way I could just not tell mom and dad he was gone. I just hate seeing him upset.

"I'm not mad at you." He rolls over and stares at me, looking so _sad_. "Mom and dad were pissed."

I nod and hug my knees. "Where did you go?"

His lips lift in a tiny grin, and I want to see him smile so big, so I sit forward and ask eagerly, "What did you do!"

"Don't you dare tell mom."

"_Ohmigosh, _what?"

"I had sex with Ryleigh," he says all proud, and oh my freaking _gosh._

"No you did not."

He nods and smirks a little, and I just cannot believe it. He had _sex._

"You snuck out to go have _sex_? What is wrong with you? Did you use a condom? Please tell me you used a condom!"

"Shh…" he hisses, sitting up, but then says, "Yes, I used a condom. I'm not stupid."

Oh _really_?

"So you like just had _sex_ with her?"

"It was her idea."

_Oh yuck!_

"Max! It was _her _idea? She hasn't even been your girlfriend that long. Do you _love_ her?"

He makes a face at that. "I don't love her. She's really freaking pretty, but you can have sex without loving someone."

_Not me! _

"So you lost your virginity to each other?"

I'm very disturbed by all of this.

"She wasn't a virgin."

"Max!"

"What?" He laughs. "She wasn't."

I _despise_ Ryleigh. If mom knew that this girl was corrupting her Maximoose, she'd be the one having a heart attack right about now. As it is, I feel like _my_ heart is attacking itself.

He lays back on the bed and grabs a tennis ball, tossing it up and down while I stare at him like he's somehow different. He _is_ different, but not because he had sex.

"Are you okay?"

He pauses his toss and looks over at me in all seriousness. "I don't know."

"I love you," I say and squeeze his arm.

"I love you too, Low."

I sit with him in silence a little longer, still so shocked that my brother had sex. I know people _do it_ all the time, but I just know that when I have for sex the first time, I want to love the boy. I want to feel so full of love that it's just so perfect and dreamy.

I want it to be with my future husband.

_Definitely._

* * *

-JW-

"Low M. just messaged you," Liam calls through the door, and what the fuck is he doing reading my messages. I yank the door open and grab my phone out of his hand and slam the fucker in his face.

He laughs like the asshole he is.

**low.m: good morning, j. you won't believe what happened!**

Oh fuck, what _did_ happen?

**jasper.w: morning, pretty girl. tell me what happened.**

I know some shit is going on with Max, so that's gotta be it. I don't think Masen would have figured out about mine and Low's _friendship_. I'm not afraid of that shit – _him – _and it's all innocent, but I don't want to lose Low, _any_ part of her.

**low.m: max had SEX last night!**

_Oh shit._

Adding toothpaste to my toothbrush, I shove it in my mouth, grinning like a fucking idiot. She's so damn cute and scandalized. I fucking love it.

**jasper.w: good for him.**

**low.m: what! no! he doesn't even love her.**

**jasper.w: that's okay, right?**

**low.m: i don't know. the only person i'll ever have sex with is my future husband.**

I jam my brush down my throat and start choking.

_What the fuck, girl! _

You bet your ass I'm that future husband. She won't be having sex with anyone but me. I don't care if it's 100 years from now.

**low.m: are you a virgin, j?**

What are you doing to me, Low?

_Quit it._

A virgin?

Shit, do I lie?

**jasper.w: uhh…**

This crazy beautiful girl is going to be the fucking death of me.

**low.m: that means no. you can say it. i won't judge you.**

I crack up and turn the shower on. She's fucking cute. She makes me wish I was a virgin.

**jasper.w: i'm not a virgin.**

**low.m: it's okay. your future wife will forgive you.**

_Damn,_ this girl is dropping hints?

I'll wife the fuck out of her.

Fuck the consequences.

I'm going to marry the hell out of her.

Not today.

Maybe not even tomorrow.

But mark my words…

This girl is fucking _mine._

…

I don't know how Low and I can live in the same goddamn town and not see other all the time. I'm going fucking crazy.

With Masen in and out of the office - mostly out - Low doesn't show her pretty face anymore. I know it's because she's helping her mom out, but fuck, I am dying to see her.

Liam's out with his girl - if you can call her that - and I want to be out with my fucking girl.

**low.m: we're having a family movie night.**

Shit, she's so _good_.

**jasper.w: good, girl. enjoy your family.**

_Come and enjoy _me_, B._

**low.m: can you believe loki's dead? he's always been one of my favorites.**

God, she makes me fucking crazy. She wants to talk Avengers, and the only thing I can think about is kissing her pretty lips.

_When can I kiss you, girl? I'm dying over here._

**jasper.w: you like the bad boys?**

**low.m: are you a bad boy?**

_I'll be whatever you want me to be._

**jasper.w: i'm not bad. do you want me to be?**

_Fuck, shut up, Jasper!_

It takes her an entire fucking five minutes to reply, and I bang my head against the mattress a few times and gnaw my fingernails down to nothing. This girl fucks with my sanity, and I fucking _love _it.

**low.m: i like you just the way you are.**

**jasper.w: you're killing me, girl.**

Low doesn't respond for the rest of the night, and I hate to admit this shit, but I had to rub one out. It was not one bit fucking satisfying.

I drag my ass into work, and Masen's been gone for this week. He's spending spring break with his family, with my girl, and I'm jealous as fuck.

Garrett is in a mood today, and I don't know what I'll do if he snaps at me one more time.

I feel on edge.

I feel like a needy bitch.

My phone beeps, and I smile when a notification from Low pops up. It's a picture of her in a bikini, and I almost swallow my fucking tongue.

She's so fucking sexy, and I don't even feel sick thinking that shit anymore. There's nothing sick about thinking your one and only girl is the sexiest damn thing on this fucking planet.

I bite my lip and try to keep my traitorous body under control.

**jasper.w: shit, b.**

**low.m.: mad begged me to get in the sprinkler.**

I'm not sure if I can stay away from her much longer.

Not fucking sure at all.


	12. the luckiest

Chapter 11  
**the luckiest**

-HM-

"Gosh, mom, he's just _so_ cute."

We're on our way to dad's office. Mom let me miss school today to go with her and Maddox to his kindergarten registration. Someone had to hold mom together when she lost it.

"I got an extra donut for him."

He _loves_ donuts.

Glazed.

I'm glad Maddox is picky and _only _wanted glazed.

"He's really not that much older than me."

I am so obsessed with Jasper, and _honestly, _I think he's obsessed with me, too.

He's my heart's desire.

My kindred spirit.

My _one _true love.

I know it.

_He _knows it.

Just watch and see.

"I think he likes me." I say, giving mom all the hints in the world, so she can prepare for the day I make Jasper truly mine.

"You are going to give your dad a heart attack." Mom finally responds as she pulls into Masen Contracting, making me giggle. I laugh harder when mom starts to laugh and then Maddox joins in.

I hope dad's heart is very healthy.

"You grab the donuts, mom. I'll help Mad."

I jump from the car and grab my cute brother, my heart racing so hard and fast, I feel like it's going to come up my throat. I don't get to see Jasper very often, and I'm so freaking excited.

Maddox drags his bag with us, and as we wait at the door for mom, he says, "I want to wear it."

"Okay, turn around." I put the oversized bag on his back and hold him steady when he starts to sway.

"I want a donut, mommy." Maddox holds his hands out always impatient for the goodies.

"Let's get inside and share with daddy first."

Jasper is standing at the counter when we walk inside the lobby and in the words of Uncle Jesse _have mercy._

I cannot stand how beautiful he is.

Our babies will be gorgeous.

"Hi, Jasper," I say, kind of blushing, kind of staring at him like he's my own personal glazed donut. I love his face. "We got donuts."

He grins, and I feel like it's a secret grin between secret friends, and my heart loves the smile just for her. I grab the donuts from mom, widening my eyes like _get lost, mommy_, but she doesn't listen.

"Maddox picked all glazed but you can have one, Jasper," I say, walking toward the counter; toward the love of my life.

I really _really_ believe he is.

Sometimes you just _know._

Jasper grabs a donut, and I watch his hand the entire time until he pulls back. "Thanks, girl." I look up at him, and he winks.

_Am I dreaming?_

_Is he an apparition? _

"Breathe, B.," he whispers softly, and I blink and smile so big my face hurts.

_I love you._

Do I?

What even is love?

"Hey Jasper," mom calls from behind me.

_Go away, mom. I want to be alone with my groom to be._

Jasper has to literally _tear_ his eyes off me. I can tell it's hard. "Mrs. Masen. How are you?"

"Good, thank you." He smiles, and I feel like my entire world is tilting.

"Mooooooommmmmmmmmmy," Maddox yells from dad's office. "We want donuts."

I squeeze the box in my hands, not wanting to leave. "Bye, Jasper," I say, regretfully.

He grins again and says quietly for my ears only. "I'll be seeing you, girl."

_Oh my gosh and holy crap._

* * *

-JW-

Low grabs her mom and leaves me all alone with my glazed donut.

Every time I fucking see her, she's more beautiful than the last.

I don't want to be up here eating this fucking donut. I want Low to come back and share it with me. I want to hear her soft voice and feel her big brown eyes on me.

I want to use my fucking lips to feel the softness of hers, and I bet my fucking ass, they're _really _fucking soft.

She drives me crazy.

She makes me want to just say _fuck it_ and march back there and pull her into my arms.

_Fuck,_ I want to feel her in my arms.

She's sweet and so damn sexy.

I shove the donut in my mouth and move around the counter to my desk and grab my phone.

**jasper.w: thanks for the donut, beautiful girl.**

She replies immediately, and _fuck me_, I need to see my girl alone.

**low.m: you're welcome. you're the beautiful one.**

Yeah, _my_ girl.

_My fucking girl._

* * *

-HM-

"Low, you can't eat all of that."

I look down at all of the snacks in my arms and then back to Leah. "Yes, I can."

My family, we've always been about the sweetness.

Leah grabs a few things of her own and wanders off for drinks while I decide between _Twizzlers_ or _Red Vines._

I grab both because _really_ how can I choose and then run smack dab into a hard human body, my treats falling all over the floor.

"Fuck, girl," _Jasper _laughs, and then we both bend down at the same time and knock our heads together, and he's laughing harder, and I want to swallow the sound down my throat. "Shit, are you okay?"

I look into his blue eyes, and I want to get lost in them. "Are you _stalking _me, J?"

He grins, and I grin and we're _both _grinning. "You're going to eat _all_ of this?" He gestures to the mess on the floor.

I nod. "Not all at once, but yes. Don't judge me."

_Kiss me._

_Love_ _me_.

_Marry me._

He chuckles and helps me gather my stuff. "I could share with you," I say, teasingly but not teasing at all.

"Would you? I _love_…what are these?" He holds up the box, scanning the front. "_Zebra_ cakes. These are my favorite."

I giggle and grab my box. "You liar."

He grins and tries to reach for it. "I'm serious, girl."

"If you're serious. I'll share _one_ with you."

"_One_? It comes with two, B. That's not fair."

Jasper helps me to my feet, his hands gripping my elbows, and when I'm on my feet, he _doesn't _let go.

I don't even want him to. His touch feels all warm and fuzzy.

"Okay," I say. "You can have both."

"Aww, thanks," he laughs, squeezing me gently, and I can't stop looking at him.

"You're so freaking cute," I blurt and don't even regret it.

_YOLO, right?_

"Am I?"

I nod, seriously. "So cute it freaking hurts."

He smiles. "Hurts what?"

"_Everything._"

He steps closer, and I stop _breathing._

I want him to share with me all his breaths. I want to always breathe the same air as him. He does such funny things to my freaking heart.

"What are you doing here?" He asks.

"Buying snacks."

A slow smile lifts his lips. "What for?"

"To _eat._"

"With who?"

My phone rings from my back pocket, making me jump, but I ignore it.

"My friend. We're going to watch movies."

He nods and bites his lip.

_Bites his freaking lip_.

"What if you watch movies with me instead?"

_Holy crap, yes._

* * *

-JW-

_Fuck_, am I really going to take her to my apartment to watch fucking movies?

_Fuck yes, I am._

Is Edward Masen going to murder me?

_Fuck yes, he is._

Do I care?

_Fuck no, I don't_.

Movies with my girl is worth the wrath of Masen.

Low texts her friend, and I pay for all of her shit. She has a sweet tooth.

"Jasper! Oh my _gosh_, mom is in labor!" Her brown eyes are wide and excited, and I feel that shit in my heart.

"No shit?"

"Shit, shit," she giggles. "I have to go with the boys. I'm sorry. I _so_ wanted to watch movies with you."

_I'm not going to touch her._

_I'm not going to fucking touch her._

_Fuck, I'm going to touch her._

I run my fingers down her bare arm until I get to her hand and slip my fingers through hers. _So fucking soft. _

She closes her hand around mine, and I look up at her face when she says, "_Gosh_, I've wanted to hold your hand for freaking forever." I laugh, and she says. "Friends can hold hands, right?"

_Friends? _

_Sure, B, sure._

"Yeah, girl, they can."

_They can kiss._

_They can get married. _

Because – _serious as fucking shit_ – I'm marrying her.

"You know," Low says, conversationally, _boldly_. "I've only kissed one boy."

I laugh and she smiles up at me. "What?"

"Is that a hint? Do you want me to kiss you, B?"

_Fucking say yes._

"Do you _want_ to kiss me, J?"

"Who was this boy?" I ask, pulling her closer to me. "Do I need to kick his ass?"

Her smile, _fuck_, it guts me. "You smell good."

_Damn_, _Low._

"I think I'll kiss you now."

She nods eagerly, and _fuck yeah,_ I'm a goner.

My lips find hers and she gasps, and holy holy _holy _fuck, her lips _are_ soft. She grips my hip, and I drop the bag and grab her gorgeous face in my hands, tilting her head back, so I can slip my tongue in her pretty mouth.

_Fuck._

No, seriously, _fuck_.

Just shit, damn, and _fuck_.

She pulls back, and whispers. "I have to go…my mom."

"Shit, B. I forgot."

_I don't want to let you go._

She smiles slowly, and I _really_ don't want to let her go. "You can have all the Zebra cakes."

I crack up, and she giggles before pulling away and bending down. She grabs the bag and pulls out the cakes, handing them to me. "I've wanted to kiss you for freaking forever."

"Go, pretty girl. Your _mom_."

"_Holy crap_," She blurts. "I have to go."

I chuckle, and she smiles one last time before jogging to her car.

She has officially and royally fucked me.

There's no going back from that, not that I fucking want to.

My girl is fucking perfect.


	13. i can't stop loving you

**These two! *heart eyes***

* * *

Chapter 12  
**i can't stop loving you**

-HM-

**low.m: the babies are so freaking cute.**

_Gosh_, they are perfect.

My little sister, though, _gah_!

I wanted to smuggle her right out of the hospital and bring her home with me tonight.

**jasper.w: give me your number, b, I want to call you.**

Call me?

_Holy crap._

I send him my number and sit up in bed, waiting for him to call me. It only takes seconds before my phone rings with an unknown number, and I answer it on the first ring.

"Hello?"

"Girl," he says, and that's all.

_Girl._

Gosh, I love it.

"Hi."

"Hey, B," he says, and I can _hear_ his smile.

"Hey, J." I say, and I can _feel _my own smile.

"Do these babies look like their sister?"

"Jasper," I tease, holding my phone in a death grip. "Are you calling me cute?"

"Yeah, B, I'm calling you cute. You _are _cute. Fucking _cute_."

I hope he can't hear my heavy panting over the phone.

How embarrassing.

"They do look like me," I joke, quietly deep breathing.

"Damn," Jasper says. "I fucking love your voice."

"Shut up," I breathe. "I can't take it."

He chuckles. "Take what?"

"_You_," I accuse. "You keep complimenting me, and I _like _it and then I get all hyperventilaty and then I can't talk right."

"But _B_," he says all low and freaking hot. "You're _so_ pretty."

_My heart _so _desires him._

He laughs when I don't respond, and I want to crawl through my phone and _hug_ him.

He is so huggable.

_Lovable._

_Snuggable._

_Uh-dorable._

_Gosh_, I'm an idiot.

"You're pretty, too," I finally say, holding back my laugh.

He truly is, though.

"And _dreamy_."

_So dreamy._

"Oh, and your eyes are my favorite and your _hair. _You're just so beautiful, J."

"What about my lips, B? Do you like my lips?"

_Do I?_

_Duh._

"Uh huh. Very much so."

He chuckles.

I _love_ him.

"I knew yours would be soft. I want to fucking kiss them again."

"Okay."

"Okay? When, B?"

_B_.

It's only _one _letter but it feels like a promise of forever.

The _husband _kind of forever.

"Whenever you want. You can kiss me anytime, J. I liked your kiss."

"Damn," he says all deep voiced and mouthwateringly delicious.

"I'm sorry I couldn't watch movies. I will be disappointed about that for like _ever._"

"It's okay, girl. You can make it up to me."

_Gulp._

"How?"

"I don't know," he teases. "Cookies. Donuts. _Zebra_ cakes."

I giggle like a stupid girl. "You ate them all didn't you?"

"Mmm…"

"I'll get you more. I can't cook, but I can buy food."

"You can't cook?" He asks curiously.

"No," I say slowly then joke, "is that like a deal breaker for your future wife?"

"Fuck no."

_Phew._

"And your future husband…any deal breakers?" He teases.

"No, none."

_Unless he's not you._

_Then, that's a major deal breaker._

* * *

-JW-

I thought it was hard enough just not seeing my girl every second of the goddamn day, but hearing her sweet, breathy voice over the phone, _fuck me_.

Feeling her kisses on my lips, _life changing._

My girl is soft and sweet. _So damn sweet. _

It's been two days since she ran away from me to go to her brothers. Two fucking days of torture. I never wanted to wash my fucking lips after having her taste on them. Feeling her skin beneath my hands felt like torment of the _best _kind.

Now she's telling me there are no deal breakers for her future husband, and I want to get on my knees and beg her to marry me right fucking now.

"I want to see you, B," I say, wanting it more than I want to fucking breathe.

"When?" She asks, and her voice sends delicious shockwaves through my entire body.

"You tell me, girl."

_Right now._

"I can't get away yet," she says, and she doesn't hide her disappointment. "But I really _really _want to see you."

"Just tell me when, and I'll be there."

_Fuck yeah, I will._

"Will you kiss me again?"

I groan and bite my fist, loving how innocent she is, _loving _that she doesn't know how much I want to do _more _than kiss her. I want to do it _all _with her.

The office is empty, but I shouldn't be on the phone, and I definitely shouldn't be letting her turn me the fuck on during working hours.

"Yeah, B. I'm going to kiss the hell out of you."

She giggles, and I can picture the blush licking across her cheeks, and she is _killing _me.

"I can't wait," she breathes.

_Damn, Low._

Just _damn._

* * *

-HM-

The babies are home, and I am totally and freakishly obsessed.

Mila is my pretty little princess.

Milo is my adorable little guy.

I just want to hug and squeeze – _very lightly – _their tiny little bodies.

Maddox is jealous that he doesn't have mom all to himself, so I take him on an ice cream date to cheer him up. I may have accidentally on _purpose _ told Jasper where I was going and what time.

"I think I want vanilla," Maddox says from the backseat. "With sprinkles."

"Yum, me too."

The ice cream shop is empty when we get there, so we get our ice cream fast. Maddox is drooling by the time it's handed to him.

We eat them in the car with the AC on. Maddox is an absolute mess by the time I toss the bottom of his cone then he's suddenly falling asleep with a messy face and sticky fingers.

Mom said he wasn't sleeping good.

My poor little brother.

He starts to snore, and I video him so mom can see.

**Where are you,** I text Jasper once I'm done.

"Knock knock."

I turn my head and come face to face with the window to my soul.

_Wow_, he's even more freaking beautiful than he was a few days ago.

I lean my head out the window and then his lips are on mine.

_Gosh,_ he's _kissing_ me and licking my lips, and I probably have ice cream breath which is embarrassing.

"Mmm," he says, licking his lips. "Hey, girl."

"Hi, J," I grin, staring at his luscious mouth.

"You ate without me."

"Sorry. Mad couldn't wait."

He peeks in the window at Maddox sleeping in the back. "Can I come in, B?"

I nod, and he grins before crossing in front of my car and pulling the passenger door open and sliding in.

"I like your shorts," I say, staring at the light dusting of hair on his muscular legs. "Your hair looks nice today."

I _do_ mean the hair on his head not his legs.

"You're just plain cute. It's crazy how cute you are. Really, I can't stop thinking about it…" Jasper grabs my hand, linking our fingers together, and I stop mid sentence.

"You're just plain pretty," he says, moving closer across the middle console. "I want another taste of those lips, B. I'm _obsessed_. Come here, girl."

I meet him in the middle, and he smiles against my mouth before devouring me, but in a slow, super sweet, taste every inch of my mouth kind of way.

I _die._

Then his tongue resurrects me, and I pull him closer. "You taste good," I whisper, licking the corner of his mouth.

"B…"

"Sorry. Keep kissing me. I'll stop talking. You're just…_so_ good at it." He starts laughing, and I feel my cheeks redden. "J! Stop laughing."

"Fuck, you're killing me."

"I don't want to kill you, I want to _kiss_ you."

His blue eyes sparkle, and I just totally freaking love his eyes.

"Then _kiss _me, B."

"Okay."

I kiss him and kiss him and kiss him.

I kiss him until my lips are numb and my heart is about to rip out of my chest.


	14. i got you

**I almost can't handle these two. I love them so much.**

* * *

Chapter 13  
**i got you**

-HM-

Mom's having me run errands for her since it's the last day of school. We only went half day and as soon as I got home, mom sent me off. She needs more diapers and wipes and we all need food. Mom also mentioned that dad was at a site until 12 today, so before I even go shopping, I stop by dad's office.

Jasper makes me so brave.

Jasper makes me so _crazy._

I never could have imagined in my life that I'd be kissing Jasper, but I _am_, and I freaking _love _it. His lips on mine feel like heaven. They taste like he's _mine._

I can't stop thinking about him. I'm so lucky I passed all of my classes. It's really a miracle since all I remember is doodling his name all over my notebooks and daydreaming about being his bride.

It's crazy how I just _know_ from the bottom of my beating heart that Jasper is the boy that I'm going to marry.

After parking in the parking lot, I wipe my sweaty palms - I hate sweaty palms - on my shorts. Jasper's in there all alone, and I love being alone with him.

I grab my bag - I brought Jasper a sweet treat - and walk super fast to the door. I don't want to waste any precious minutes alone with my favorite boy in the world.

_I'm so sorry, Max._

_Leo._

_Noah._

_Ollie._

_Mad._

_Milo._

_Dad._

Gosh, there are so many precious boys in my life.

When I peek through the glass doors, I don't see Jasper, and my heart falls. He _has _to be here. Where else could he be?

* * *

-JW-

_Fuck._

Masen is going to fucking kill me if I don't find the damn quote for the apartment complex being put in down by the lake.

_Where the fuck is it?_

The door opens but thinking it's Masen back from his lunch break, I ignore it, pretending like I didn't lose the fucking quote he needs.

Looking under the desk like a fucking idiot, of course I don't find it.

"What are you doing, J?"

I bang my head on the bottom of the desk at the sound of Low's sweet as fuck voice. She giggles, and I'll admit, that's fucking embarrassing, but because my girl is fucking here, _fuck_ embarrassment.

I lift my head and find pretty brown eyes and a smile I'd fucking die for. "Hey, B." I grin.

Her smile gets even bigger and she says, "Hey, J."

She leans over the high counter, and I lean back in my chair because if I get up right now, I'm going to ravage the fuck out of those pouty lips. With my fucking luck her dad would walk in while I was giving her a good tongue loving.

_Goddamn him._

"You came to see me?"

She nods, wide-eyed and so damn innocent. "School's out for the summer. I'll be seeing _a lot_ of you, J." She leans even further over the counter, having to get on her tiptoes. "I'll be _kissing_ you _all _summer." _Fuck me. _"Don't you want to kiss me, J?"

_Do I?_

_Crazy fucking girl._

"Shit yeah, B."

She giggles, and I lean forward, looking up at her as she stands before me, an entire fucking counter between us. I want to do more than kiss her, but my girl is so innocent. I crave her sweet little touches and her soft lips, and I don't want her dirty. I want her fucking _sweet._

"You're so far away," she says.

"I know, girl, but your dad is going to walk in the door any fucking second."

She looks over her shoulder and then back to me, her lips all turned down, and I legit want to pull her over this counter and shove my tongue down that pretty little throat.

"I really _really_ want to kiss you, J. It's been so long."

_It's been three days. I fucking counted._

I chuckle, and she smiles slow.

"Girl."

"It _has_. I love your mouth. It's all warm and yummy."

"_Fuck_," I rasp, staring at her, on the verge of losing my motherfucking sanity. My girl is so fucking blunt and honest.

_Give me more, B._

_Tell me how much you want me._

Her hand disappears, and when she holds it back up, she has a fucking _Zebra_ cake and a secret smile. Her smile lights up my fucking life.

"You brought me a treat, girl?"

She nods, and my chest aches. I want to touch her so fucking bad.

_I want to fucking love this girl so fucking hard._

"I had to fight Mad for it this morning. He almost won." She rips it open and shoves an entire cake in her mouth, and _damn. _"You have to share," she giggles, holding out the other one to me. I grip her hand and hold her in place as I stand from the chair and press a quick, rough kiss to her cake crummy lips, licking them and then pecking them one more time. Then I sit the fuck back down and shove the entire cake in my mouth, because _fuck me_ do I want more.

"Gosh, J."

Yeah, fucking _gosh, _B.

* * *

-HM-

Jasper is chewing his treat, and I stare at him as he watches me. I don't know what's _better_; ice cream smooches or cake kisses.

"You're gonna get me killed, girl," he says after swallowing.

"What? I don't want you to die," I say, still trying to decide which is better. I think it's a tie. How can one be better than the other? As long as his lips are on mine, I don't freaking care if they taste like vanilla sprinkles or _Little Debbie._

He chuckles and shakes his head, and I just _love _him.

I _do._

_I loooove him!_

"Will you protect me?"

"What?" I ask kind of confused. Doesn't he know I'm still thinking about his lips. _Sheesh._

"B," he laughs, leaning back in his chair. "You aren't paying any attention to me."

_What!_

"I'm sorry. I was just thinking…"

The door opens behind me, and _holy crap_, don't be dad. Jasper shifts to the side and back before nodding, his lips lifting into a tiny grin.

_Gulp._

"Call me, girl," he says quietly, and I nod.

"Bye, J."

He winks.

_Don't do that!_

I turn away from Jasper's beautiful face and find dad's eyes narrowed on his future son-in-law.

_Holy crap._

I don't look over my shoulder when Dad hugs me even though I want to badly. Dad leads me down the hall, and I know he's a little upset, but I pray he doesn't question what's going on. I'm not sure why I'm so scared. Three years is not much of a difference, but Jasper _is _an adult.

"How was school?" Dad asks, falling into his chair. "Did you have lunch?"

"No, mom sent me to the store as soon as we got home. Want to feed me? I'm starving."

He chuckles and tosses me a bag of peanuts, and when I scrunch my nose, he stands and says he'll take me for a burger.

_Yum._

"Should we get Jasper something?" I ask as we walk down the short hallway.

He gives me a funny look, and I smile and shrug and hope my eyes aren't full of hearts. "It'll be rude if we don't at least ask."

_We can't be rude to Jasper, dad._

He asks Jasper before I can, and I stand back and listen to them discuss burgers and fries. When dad's done, he turns his back on Jasper, and I die completely when Jasper lifts his chin at me and smiles like a secret lover.

_Gosh, I feel weak._

I wave and smile so hard my face hurts.

Dad doesn't notice.

I _almost _wouldn't care if he did.

_Almost._

…

I wish I was on the phone with Jasper, but his cousin wanted to hang out and Jasper felt bad for ignoring him so much. Gosh, he's such a nice guy.

I'm laying across my bed, painting my nails clear when Maddox comes in and plops down next to me.

"I'm bored, Low, and mommy's with the _babies_."

He crosses his little arms over his chest and pouts his little lip, and it crushes me a little. Mom would be devastated if she knew how much Mad felt neglected.

I toss my nail polish on the nightstand and pull him into my lap. "You want to watch a movie?"

"No."

"Hmm...okay. You want to play legos?"

"No."

He huffs and puffs, and I stifle a giggle because I know he's not pretending to be put out by two precious babies in the house.

"Want to go jump on the trampoline?"

"What? In the _dark_?"

"Yeah, let's go. Are you scared, Mad?"

"I'm not scared," he says, crawling from my lap and puffing out his little chest. "Can my brothers come?"

_His _brothers?

"Of course. Go get _our _brothers."

He grins and runs out of the room, and I grab my phone and text Jasper.

**I miss your pretty face, j.**

He types back immediately, and my heart warms.

**j: girl…**

I smile to myself, and send him a kissy face before stuffing my phone under my pillow. When I hear loud boy stomps in the hall, I run out the door, so we can cheer Maddox up. I'll have to have Max or Leo help me with the babies tomorrow, so Maddox can have his mommy back.

Maddox has so much fun _tramping _in the dark, he wants to get blankets and _sleep _outside. I'm okay with jumping in the dark but sleeping outside freaks me out, but when Maddox begs and pleads, I feel bad, so I agree but only if I can sleep in the middle.

"I want middle, too," Maddox calls, rolling across the trampoline until he's dead center.

"Let me go get blankets and tell mom and dad," I say, laughing.

"I'll help," Leo says.

Mom and dad are okay with it, and when we're headed back out, dad comes with us and hangs out for a while.

Maddox _loves _it.

We all do.

…

"Come over, girl. I want to see you."

It's been two weeks since I've last laid eyes on Jasper.

_Two freaking weeks._

After dad walked into the office to find me alone with Jasper, mom's kept me busy with the twins and Maddox.

Dad is _very_ suspicious.

I do wonder if it would just be better to tell him.

But then again, what am I really telling him?

That Jasper's like _my_ guy.

Or that his kisses make me feel all dizzy and swoony.

I could tell him that he's going to have to get used to this because Jasper's the sprinkles to my ice cream, the zebra to my cake, the boy who makes my heart ache…in a good way; a _beautiful _way.

In an _i'm going to marry that boy someday_ kind of way.

"When?"

"Shit, _right now_, B."

I giggle and slip on a pair of my favorite _Birkenstocks_. "I don't know where you live, J."

"Fuck, that's right. Damn, I miss your pretty face, girl, and your _lips_. I want to feel your lips all over me."

_All over him. _

_Oh my gosh!_

"All over you?" I ask, kind of blushing, heart kind of pounding.

"I meant all over my lips, Low," he says softly, but I hear the smile in his voice and my body _tingles. _"You want that, girl? You want your lips all over my lips?"

"I always do," I say, breathless and definitely blushing. "I can meet you."

"Where do you want me?"

_All over me?_

"The park by the lake?"

"Yeah?"

"Yeah. I'll leave now."

"I'll see you soon," he says into my ear.

"Okay."

"Okay, B," he says, chuckling softly.

"Hang up, J."

It takes him a minute then he's gone.

_Gosh,_ I can't freaking wait to see him.

* * *

-JW-

When I pull up to the park, Low is sitting on a picnic table, her eyes on me over her shoulder. Her hair is down, and she makes me so goddamn weak in the fucking knees.

"You came," she says, smiling like she thought I wouldn't.

_Not a fucking chance, girl._

I take a seat next to her. "Hey, B."

"Hey, J."

"Where are you supposed to be?"

_I know not with me._

"Right here," she grins and scoots closer, her bare leg pressing along my thigh. "Aren't you going to kiss me?"

"I was thinking about it," I tease, staring at her lips. "How bad do you want it?"

She giggles and leans into me, her soft hand snaking around my hip, and _fuck me_, she makes me want to do so many fucking dirty things to her. "J," she whispers through a smile. "Kiss me hello. It's rude not to…"

I press my lips to hers, cutting her off and use her open mouth to my advantage, slipping my tongue into the wet heat of her perfect fucking mouth.

_How is this girl so fucking perfect?_

_Why do I want nothing more than to kiss her for the rest of my fucking life?_

I play with her tongue and drown in her adorable, breathy gasps before pulling back and pressing a hard, closed mouth kiss against her pouty lips. "How was it, B? Do you want more?"

_Because, fuck me, I do, B. So much fucking more._

She opens her eyes, looking lost and cute as fuck, making me chuckle and bury my face in her neck. "Gosh, you're just so good at that," she says, snaking a hand beneath the back of my shirt. "I could kiss you forever."

_Fuck._

* * *

-HM-

_Gosh_, his skin is so soft and his hair, _oh my gosh, _it smells so good. He presses a kiss to my throat, and I think I'm dying.

No, _seriously_, my heart is pounding so hard I think it's going to just get so tired and just _stop_.

Jasper's tongue licks a path up my throat, and _holy crap_, I can't feel my freaking toes. He kisses my chin, my cheek, and then corner of my mouth, his blue eyes on me and they look _so_ bright.

"You're gorgeous, J. It makes me crazy."

He smiles, and teases, "How crazy, girl?"

I giggle and kiss his nose, making him scrunch it so freaking adorable that I want to do it again. "I don't know. Like _crazy _crazy."

He pulls back and kisses me again, wonderful and wet, and I run my fingers through his hair and freaking melt into a puddle on a park bench on a hot summer day.

Like _today._

When he lets me finally breathe again, I only wish to be breathless.

"Want to go swimming, B?"

My eyes widen, and I glance to the side at the murky lake water. "Uhh…"

He laughs, and I love the way his eyes crinkle. "You afraid to get dirty, girl?"

"I'm afraid of what's beneath the water. Like what if a fish touches me or like a snake." I gasp. "Wait, _are_ there snakes in there?"

"Fuck, you're cute," he says, standing from the bench and pulling me to my feet. "Kick your shoes off."

He kicks off his own shoes and pulls his shirt over his head, and _holy crap_, he just took off his freaking shirt. He bends forward and pulls his socks off and then he's grabbing my hand, saying again, "Girl, your shoes."

I snap out of my state of shock and slide my feet from my shoes, and Jasper grabs my hand and pulls me to the water.

"J…" I yank on his hand. "This is really freaking me out." He looks back at me, and he's _laughing _at me. "It's not funny, J!"

"Come here, girl," he says, chuckling and yanking on my hand until I'm standing in front of him. "Hop up."

_Hop up?_

_What?_

He lifts me into his arms, making me squeal and then he's walking us into the water, and I'm trying not to hyperventilate but it's hard because I'm literally being held in his _freaking arms._

_Oh my gosh!_

_Holy crap!_

"Breathe, B," he says, squeezing my legs with strong hands.

_I can't freaking breathe, J!_

He wades into the water, and when we're waist deep, he lowers to his knees. "You okay, girl?"

I don't answer him with my words, but my lips do a lot of talking.

_You're so freaking hot_, they say.

_I freaking love you,_ they whisper.

_Oh my gosh_, they sigh.

"Fuck, girl," Jasper says roughly.

I don't _ever _cuss, but yeah, _fuck_, boy.


	15. i need you

**I'm almost done playing catch up, and I'm so freaking excited!**

* * *

Chapter 14  
**i need you**

-JW-

The days fucking drag even though summer's already almost over. I haven't spent enough time with my girl, and it's driving me crazy.

Secret meetings and hot kisses just aren't going to cut it anymore.

I want my girl _right _here in my bed. I fucking _need _it. I'll never pressure her for more than she wants to give, but I just want to goddamn cuddle her in my arms all night for fucking _forever._

The more I get to know her, the more attached I get. I can barely get through the days without talking to her, and it's a fucking treat when I lay my eyes on her in person. It's true what they say; _distance makes the heart grow fonder_, but I'm ready for the closeness, so my heart can make love to Low's heart.

_Shit_, I sound like a pussy.

_Do I care?_

No.

Masen closed the office down for two weeks - paid vacation - and without work and school to keep me busy, I'm going crazy.

Once the clock hits 12, I drag my ass out of bed and head to my mom's for lunch. She's going to spoil the hell out of me for two weeks, and I'm going to let her.

On the way over, Low calls me on facetime, and my girl wants me to wreck, showing me that pretty face while I'm driving.

"J," she smiles, her pearly whites so close to the screen. "Are you driving?"

"Hey, B. I'm on the way to my mom's. She's feeding me lunch."

Low pouts, and it does shit to my heart. "I wish I could feed you."

"You don't know how to cook, girl," I say, glancing between the road and the phone.

She giggles. "I could make you a sandwich or microwave you nuggets. I can cook pizza in the oven. Really, I can put anything in the oven. That's _easy_…"

I chuckle, and her smile gets bigger. "I want to see you, B."

"You're looking right at me, J," she says, the cute little jokester.

I switch lanes and turn down the road leading to my mom's, my stomach growling. I should really start adulting better if I don't want to starve.

"I want to kiss those funny lips, girl, and maybe those cute cheeks, and I definitely want to take a bite out of that neck…"

She gasps and runs a hand over her neck, and my dick gets so damn hard. Shit, that's all I need right now.

"...meet me, B, before I fucking die."

She licks her lips, and I bang my head against the headrest. "I'll try, J," she says, softly, her smile full watt. "I'll try really hard."

_Fuck._

My mom's waving from the porch, and my dick is rock hard, and Low's staring at me all lovingly through the phone screen, and shit, I'm fucked.

"Girl, I gotta go. My mom's waiting."

"Okay. I hope so bad I can get away later."

_Me too, Low._

She blows me a kiss, and goddamn, I feel that everywhere. Worst of all in my damn pants. I want to just punch the shit out of my traitorous body for being a horny motherfucker right now.

I haven't had sex in over a year, and it's starting to show.

"Bye, J."

"Later B. Call me."

She nods and smiles and then hangs up.

I wait a few minutes until my body's under control and then let my mom feed me lunch.

She's a fucking saint.

…

Liam's been seeing the same chick for months.

_How do I not know her name?_

I can hear them out in the living room, and my stomach burns with jealousy because I want it to be me and my girl hanging out, laughing and kissing and cuddling.

"I'm sorry," Low says in my ear. "Mom and dad wouldn't let me leave."

"It's okay, girl."

"Mom said I could get Starbucks with Leah tomorrow, but I won't really be with Leah, you know?"

God, she's too damn cute.

"Yeah, I get it, B. You won't be drinking coffee. You're gonna let me hug and kiss you instead, huh?"

"Gosh, yes," she breathes, and I can tell she's smiling, and I'm definitely smiling.

She makes me feel like a damn teenager with his first crush except I'm not crushing on Low, I'm fucking _loving _Low.

"You want to meet at the park?"

"Yes," she says through a yawn.

"Go to sleep, girl. I want you rested for tomorrow."

"I could just sleep in your arms," she teases.

"You can't kiss me when you're sleeping."

"Oh, right," she giggles. "Okay, I'll go to sleep. I can't wait to see you."

"Sweet dreams, B."

_I fucking love you._

"Goodnight, J."

She hangs up, and I turn the T.V. on to drown out the sounds of Liam fucking his girl. I really do need to move the fuck out now.

_Fuck that shit._

…

In the two weeks I had off, I saw Low three times. My girl's getting braver with her kisses and her touches, and she's driving me so fucking insane.

Summer's over now, and not only do I have to fight for Low's family for her attention, now we're both back in school, and we need to step shit up.

We need to tell her family what's up and let Masen get pissed so he can get over it, and I can spend time with my girl.

Take her to dinner.

To the movies.

To my goddamn bed.

The door swings open and Mrs. Masen pushes in with the twins in her arms.

I don't know how she handles two babies at once.

Standing from my chair, I round the counter, and when Mrs. Masen smiles at me, she looks so fucking much like Low, it hits me right in the fucking heart.

"Hey, Mrs. Masen," I say, taking a peek at the twins that Low adores so much. They really are fucking cute.

"Hi, Jasper," she says, tiredly, lifting the babies higher in her arms.

"Can I?" I ask, holding an arm out for one of the twins. I don't even fucking know why. I can't even remember a time when I've held a baby before.

"This is Mila," Mrs. Masen says, smiling proudly.

I take her, kind of freaking the fuck out, but cradling her gently in my arms. She has two fingers in her mouth, sucking like crazy, and it's really fucking cute. "She's cute," I say, grinning at Mrs. Masen.

_Not as cute as Low, if I'm being honest, and yes, I know, I'm a fucking idiot._

"I do make some cute babies," she grins.

Mila starts cooing in my arms, her big eyes opening, and damn, she melts my fucking heart. When I marry my girl she's definitely going to give me a few of these babies.

_Damn._

"Oh, look who's here, babies. It's daddy." Mrs. Masen starts talking in a baby babble voice, and I stifle a chuckle as I watch Masen enter the room.

He comes straight to me, and says, "give me my girl, Jasper," and honestly, I don't really want to. She's so small, and she smells good, and I quite like her, but fuck, she's his kid and who am I to tell him no.

I hand her over, and Masen kisses her face and fucking _coos_ sweet words to her.

_Holy shit._

Mrs. Masen is grinning at him all heart eyes and shit, and damn, do I want Low to be looking at me like that right now.

"You can go to lunch, Jasper," Masen says, wrapping an arm around his wife. "I'll cover the office."

"Alright, be back in an hour."

Mrs. Masen smiles at me over her shoulder as Masen leads her down the hall. I grab my phone and text my girl.

**meet me for lunch, b?**

**b: yes! where do i meet you?**

**down the street at the burger place.**

**b: can't wait to see you, j.**

_Fuck_, she's so damn cute.

**see you soon, girl.**

When I pull up, Low's already waiting for me. She's sitting in her car, and when I pull up next to her, her entire fucking face lights up, and she jumps out of her car and climbs into my truck.

"Hey, J." She gives me all her pretty teeth then she leans across the console and gives me her pretty lips.

Just _damn_, I'll never get used to the taste of her mouth.

"Hey, B," I whisper and lick across her lips and give her a peck before pulling back.

"I'm starving," she says, her big brown eyes staring into my fucking soul. "I gave my breakfast to Henri."

My brows furrow, and I say, "Henri?"

_Who the fuck is Henri?_

Low giggles and kisses my cheek before sitting back on her side. I miss her immediately. "He's in my math class. His stomach is always growling. Maybe he doesn't have a lot of food at home, and anyway, I have _plenty_ of food, so he probably needs it more than me."

_Fuck, I love her._

"You're so goddamn sweet," I say, making her blush.

"Are you going to feed me?" She sasses, fluttering her big brown eyes.

I chuckle and hop down from the truck. "Be back, girl."

"I'll be waiting."

_Fuck yeah, you will._

The food's ready, and I grab our shit and haul my ass back to my girl so I can feed her. She's messing with my stereo, putting on some Ed Sheeran bullshit, but because I love the fuck out of her, I deal with the lovey dovey girly shit.

"Mmmm, it smells sooooo good," she says, grabbing the bag out of my hand. "Did you say no to everything but cheese?"

"Shit yeah. That's how you like it."

"Gosh, you're the best." She grabs her burger and hands me mine. She rips into hers immediately, and I fucking love that she's not embarrassed to eat in front of me.

"You better eat, J, before I eat yours, too," she jokes with her mouth full.

I laugh and start eating. I'd give it to her, though, if she really wanted it.

I'd give my girl the entire fucking world.

Fuck yeah, I would.

* * *

-HM-

"Peter said he saw you with Jasper at lunch," Max says on the ride home.

_Oh no._

"You can't tell dad," I say, glancing at him sitting next to me.

"I won't tattle," he says, laughing. "So, what? You're seeing him?"

I roll my lips and tighten my fingers on the wheel. I can trust my brother, but I hate that I've been lying for months.

"Yes," I finally say.

"He's like 30."

"What! No, he's not!"

Max laughs, and I breathe a little easier. "Just be careful, Low. I don't want to have to kick his ass."

"Awww, how sweet, Maximoose."

He groans. "Shut up."

When we get home, mom is cooking dinner and Milo and Mila are in their little swings and Maddox is sitting on the counter, sucking on an applesauce packet.

"Max," Maddox yells, ignoring me, and Max goes to our brother and scoops him off the counter.

"What's up, Mad Dog?"

"Nothin. I got nuggets at school today."

"Cool. I bet mommy's are better."

Maddox nods his head really fast, and mom laughs.

"Will you take me outside?"

"Yeah, let's go."

Max kisses mom's cheek on the way out, and then I kneel on the floor and baby talk to my brother and sister, trying to make them giggle and drool.

"Jasper met the twins today," mom says, and I choke on my own spit.

"Yeah?"

"I went to see your dad. He held Mila."

_Oh my gosh, and I missed it!_

"Dad stole her real quick."

I laugh and pull Milo from his swing, kissing his adorable little face. He grabs my cheeks with his little fingers, and I kiss his cute face.

I wonder what Jasper looked like holding my sister. I bet he looked so freaking hot. He's hot without a baby, but _with_ a baby I bet her was even more gorgeous.

My phone vibrates its ring in my pocket, and I give Milo another kiss before placing him back in his swing. I pull my phone out, and Jasper is calling me. Mom's watching me when I look up, so I smile and kiss her cheek and then run upstairs to take Jasper's call.

"Hey, J," I say all out of breath.

"Hey, B, what's wrong?"

"I ran upstairs to answer your call." I throw myself on my bed and close my eyes, trying to catch my breath.

"I miss you, girl."

_Gosh, my freaking heart._

"I miss you more. Thanks for lunch."

"This weekend," he says, voice low. "Come over."

_Heck yes._

"Okay."

"Okay, B. Eat breakfast tomorrow, girl. I'll buy your lunch."

"Okay," I say again, smiling.

"I don't want my girl to starve," he says, and I hear his smile.

_I freaking love you, J!_


	16. endless love

Chapter 15  
**endless love**

-HM-

It's the weekend, and Jasper said _come over_. Now I'm on the way, and I'm kind of freaking out. Mom and dad think I'm staying over at Leah's, but really, I'm _staying _at Jasper's. I'm pretty sure this is illegal in all 50 states.

I don't want Jasper to go to _jail._

When I pull into the parking lot of Jasper's apartment, I feel like I'm hyperventilating. Like I feel like my heart is going to just stop beating, but then I look up, and Jasper is jogging down the stairs that lead up to his apartment, and my stomach flips 100 back flips.

_Gosh, I'm going to have a sleepover with a boy!_

_If dad finds out he's going to kill me._

He taps on my window, grinning like the most beautiful boy I've ever seen in my life. I smile and crack the window a smidge. "Yes?"

He shakes his head, the flash of his white teeth nearly blinding me. "Girl." I roll the window back up and click the lock on the doors, and he immediately pulls it open and squats down in front of me. "Hey, B," he whispers through his smile, grabbing my hand and holding it.

"Hey, J." I press a kiss to his lips and officially care about nothing other than the feel of my future husband's lips on mine. "Are you sure this is a good idea?"

"It's the worst idea. Do you want to go home?" I shake my head, and he smiles. "Come on, then."

He grabs my bag, and I hold his hand as he leads us up to his apartment.

_I'm so freaking nervous._

When he pushes the door open to his apartment, my heart is pounding an uneven rhythm, but when he grins at me and squeezes my hand, I know it will be okay.

"Are you thirsty, B? Hungry?" He tosses my bag on the couch, and I nod my head yes, because I'm _always_ hungry. "Look, girl, I got you cakes."

"Gosh, you're so sweet, J," I gush, and he shakes his head, ripping into the plastic of a Zebra cake.

"You can have them both," he says, handing me the package.

I stuff my mouth, because I am still just so freaking nervous.

* * *

-JW-

Fuck, she's cute.

Her mouth is full, and she's chewing all slow like she's scared of what's going to happen as soon as she swallows all that cake.

I have no intentions of pressuring my girl. I just want her all to myself all night even if it's just to kiss her fucking pretty face off.

She finally swallows, and I step into her space, loving the sweet smile that spreads across her lips. "I want to kiss you, girl."

"I want you to kiss me, J," she says, nodding and nodding, and I fucking love that I have her here, that I can touch her without worrying about someone's eyes on us. "Are you going to?"

I chuckle, and she wraps her arms around my neck. "J," she kind of whines, _smiles, _and it does crazy shit to my heart. "Kiss me."

I press my lips against hers, she sighs and pulls me harder against her, and I slip my tongue between her sweet lips. She tastes like cake and perfection, and I pull her harder against me. Her fingers play with the ends of my hair, and I let my hands drop down low on her hips.

My brain is telling me to take it all from her, but my heart, he knows my girl needs it slow. She's so fucking sweet, and he wants the best for his future wife.

When she moans all sweet like and presses closer, feeling what I know is so fucking hard behind my zipper, she pulls back with rosy red cheeks and wide brown eyes, making me chuckle, roughly.

"It's your fault, girl," I tease, using the back of my hand to rub her blushed out cheek. "You're too sweet."

"J," she giggles, so fucking innocent. "Show me your room."

_Oh fuck._

* * *

-HM-

Jasper holds my hand and pulls me down the short hallway to his bedroom.

His _bedroom!_

I'm trying not to hyperventilate, but it's so hard because this is Jasper's _bedroom_, and I so badly want to see where he sleeps, where he lays when he talks to me all hours into the night, where I'll lay when I'm sleeping with him tonight.

I still can't believe I _lied_ and am staying the night with my _boyfriend._

Jasper pushes into his room, and I walk in behind him, my eyes scanning every inch of his _boy _room.

_Oh my gosh!_

I can't believe I'm standing in his room.

His bed is so big, and everything looks so clean.

I side-eye him, and he's watching me with his cute as crap smirk, and I just want to kiss him again. Maybe we could lay on his big bed and kiss because I would so _love _that. Jasper is my future husband, the _one _boy who gets my heart and _everything _that comes with it.

"You okay, B?" Jasper asks, wrapping a hand around my waist.

I nod even though I can't freaking breathe.

He nuzzles my cheek with his nose before kissing the same cheek. "You'll sleep with me tonight, girl? I want to cuddle the hell out of you."

I give him wide-eyes and a nod, and he chuckles.

_Oh my gosh, I so freaking love him._

"I'll be a good boy, B," he whispers, pulling on my hand. "I promise."

_Holy crap, J._

He sits on the edge of his bed and places his hands on my hips. I feel like I'm shaking so bad. He's looking up at me, and he is just so freaking beautiful.

"What are you looking at, girl?"

I run the back of my finger down his nose and when he closes his eyes, I _die_. "I want to sit on your lap."

His eyes blink open, and he pulls me onto his lap. "You're making it so hard to be good," he says, pecking my lips, my face, my _neck_. "Why are you so fucking pretty?" His arms wrap tight around me. "You smell good. _Fuck_, B, so good I could just eat your neck."

I giggle, and he lifts his head, grinning at me. "You're crazy."

"You make me crazy."

"I don't try to," I say, staring at his lips. Lips I just _love _to kiss and kiss and _kiss_. I do it, peck his perfect lips over and over, and I feel like my heart is going to beat right out of my chest.

* * *

-JW-

Having my girl in my arms, in my fucking _room_ is so fucking crazy. If Masen found out, he'd fucking kill me and then hide my body. His girl, _my_ fucking girl, is too irresisitable to stay away from.

This is my future wife. Masen can't keep my future wife away from me.

_No fucking way._

I lay back on the bed, pulling Low with me, keeping her lips pressed to mine, slipping my tongue into her wet mouth. Her hair is all over my face, and her cute little ass is all over my dick.

I can't stay calm.

_I can't fucking do it._

My girl bites my lip, and I'm _done._ I flip her over, swallowing her cute yelp and lay over her, ho_l_ding myself up so I don't smash her but keep my mouth sealed to hers.

I don't ever want my lips to leave hers.

Her lips were fucking made for my lips.

These lips are _mine._

"J," Low whispers against my mouth, hesitantly running her hands up my sides, beneath my shirt.

"Yeah, girl?" I rasp, sucking on her bottom lip.

"I want you to take your shirt off. I want to see you."

_Damn, B, what are you doing to me?_

I push up and stand from the bed. "What if you don't like what you see?" I tease, not doing a thing to hide how hard I am for her, not that I'd have any way to hide it anyway.

She laughs and sits up. "I think I'll like it, J. _A lot_." She bites her lip, and she's such a motherfucking seductress, my girl, and she doesn't even know it.

I pull my shirt off and toss it to the side, and she runs those pretty brown eyes all over my skin before moving them to my face. "Do you want me to take mine off?"

"B…"

"I want to. Is that weird? I don't have to…" she says, looking up at me all sweet and earnest.

Pulling her to her feet, I kiss her cheek, and she places her small hands on my chest. "You can do whatever you want, girl."

_But _fuck me, _it's going to kill me when you do._

Seeing my girl with no shirt on is too fucking much

"Will you take it off me?"

_Oh fuck._

Her taking her shirt off is one thing, but me doing it, she's going to bring me to my fucking knees.

I grip her hips and look down at her. Her eyes are on my chest, her fingers making little patterns, making me breathe like a nervous little bitch.

_I'll be your bitch, girl._

_Fucking _always.

Slowly I start to slide her shirt up, and her brown eyes meet mine. "I think I love you," she says, all heart and honesty.

_Damn._

"I _know_ I love you, girl."

"What!" She gasps. "You _love_ me, J?"

I nod and keep lifting her shirt. "_You _love _me_, B?"

She nods and smiles and lights up my fucking world. "I've loved you for freaking forever!"

"Ditto, girl," I grin. "For fucking forever." I pull her shirt over her head, and she's still smiling up at me, my innocent girl. "No more clothes off."

She nods and giggles and hugs my waist, pressing her cheek against my heart.

_Yeah, I'm a fucking goner._


	17. crazy stupid love

Chapter 16  
**crazy stupid love**

-HM-

I got away with staying with Jasper two weeks ago, but I hate lying to mom and dad. But if I tell them the truth, they'll be so mad at me - at Jasper.

What would dad to do Jasper?

My gosh, _Jasper._

I've found what mom and dad have, and I will die if I ever have to give him up. I don't care how young I am. I just _know _I'm meant to be with him.

Laying with him in his bed without our shirts on was so heart pounding beautiful. I love how soft his skin is, and I love the way his hands feel running all over my body.

Gosh, I get chills just thinking about it.

He's all I think about _all the time._

I can't wait until I get to stay with him again.

**i miss you,** I text him while laying in bed trying to fall asleep.

**j: i miss you more, b. my bed still smells like you.**

My phone rings, and my smile hurts my face when I see his name on the screen.

"Hello."

"Why aren't you sleeping, girl?"

I roll onto my side and squeeze my phone tight in my hand. "I like sleeping with you," I say. "I can't sleep now. You ruined me."

He groans. "You're killing me, B. I want you right here with me all the fucking time."

"I'll come over," I say, meaning it, just _wanting _to see him so badly.

"I can't condone such bad behavior, girl," he says, making me giggle like an idiot.

"But I want to see you, J. I _really_ want to see you."

"How bad, baby?"

_Baby?_

My _gosh_, he just called me _baby! _

The butterflies are on a rampage in my stomach, and my cheeks feel hot.

_I'm Jasper's baby!_

"B…"

"Really bad," I breathe, staring at the imperfect paint scratch on my wall. "I miss you every second."

"Fuck, B."

Jasper makes me want to say all the bad words. He makes me feel so warm and cozy.

I just love him so much.

"I'm coming over," I say, knowing it's late and knowing if mom and dad knew I was planning to sneak away in the middle of the night to meet my one true love, they'd have a heart attack.

"You can't, Low…"

"It's okay," I say, sitting up. "I'll be so quiet. I _need _to see you."

-JW-

Fuck, she's going to destroy me.

But I welcome that shit with open arms.

"I'll come get you," I say, knowing it's a fucking horrible idea but not being able to bear having her _need_ me and not have me.

My girl's asking for trouble, but she's so fucking hard to not give in to.

People do a lot of stupid shit for love.

Having her in my bed was a mistake, a big fucking mistake, because now I'm more obsessed with her and her big brown eyes than before.

Her smile.

Her sweet, innocent touches.

Her cute voice and adorable laugh.

I want to feed her sweet treats and make love to her so fucking hard.

My girl will never get fucked.

I want her soft, sweet and slow beneath me.

Fuck, I'm going to lose my mind.

My girl makes me fucking _mindless._

"You will?"

"Yeah, B. It's a bad idea, but…"

"Come now," she says, and I can tell she's smiling.

I slide from my bed and pull my shirt on before slipping my shoes on. "It can't be long, girl. You have school and I have work, and I don't want you in trouble…"

"Jasper," she says, adorably impatient. "Come get me."

Damn and fuck, girl.

"I'm on my way."

"Okay," she breathes.

Like I said…

_Damn _and _fuck._

-HM-

I can't believe I snuck out of the house. Jasper makes me brave and stupid, but his love is worth the trouble I'll be in if I'm caught.

How am I going to go all the days without him? I want to be near him all the time.

I slide into Jasper's truck, and immediately kiss his beautiful lips over and over. When his hands land on my waist, I feel goosebumps all over my body.

"B, we have to tell your dad," he says when I pull away.

"What?"

He runs a thumb across my lip, and I close my eyes and see a million stars.

"He needs to know I'm your guy, girl."

I nod and kiss his thumb, listening to the sound of his voice catch in his throat. "We can tell him," I say, scared and nervous but wanting nothing more than to tell the whole world Jasper's mine. "Can we go to your apartment?"

"B," he says, grinning. "Are you trying to get me all alone?"

Gosh, he's freaking _cute_.

I nod and grab his hand.

"Buckle up, girl."

I sit right next to him in the middle and buckle up, feeling my heart in my throat at the sneakiness of tonight. I feel bad for betraying mom and dad's trust but I _love_ Jasper.

My heart hurts when he's not around and after our weekend I'm even more obsessed with his love.

His hands.

His face.

His _body_.

Jasper gives me heart eyes and butterflies, and I can't wait to hug him and kiss him in his bed again.

His hand lands on my leg, gently squeezing, and holy _crap, J!_

"You're making me crazy," I say, tracing lines across his fingers with my fingers.

He laces his fingers with mine and kisses my fingers. "Ditto, girl."

I smile, feeling breathless and so freaking stupid in love.

-JW-

It's the middle of the night, and my girl's in my apartment without permission.

I feel like a walking fucking felony.

If I wasn't madly in love with her, she'd be tucked safely in her bed, but this girl - my fucking girl - makes me do stupid shit.

When Masen gets done with me, I'll only be half the man I am now, and she's totally worth it and _more._

Low's sitting in the middle of my bed, looking every bit of my goddamn wife, and if it was two weeks from now and she was already 18, we'd be in Vegas saying our fucking I do's.

Fuck, she was so meant to be mine.

"J," she says, smiling sweet. "Why are you way over there?"

Because if I'm right _there_, I won't be able to stop myself from doing all the things I want to do to you.

"I don't know, girl. You want me over there?"

She nods, wide eyed and perfect.

I pull my shirt over my head, and she bites her lip.

_Fuck_.

When I'm standing at the edge of my bed, she climbs to her knees and pulls her shirt off.

My knees are fucking weak.

"B…"

"J," she says, scooting to the edge and wrapping her arms around my shoulders. "I want you to _love_ me."

My hands land on her hips, fingers digging in gently. "You have all my love, B."

She shakes her head, looks away before those perfect brown eyes are back on me, ready to destroy me. "I want you to _make_ love to me."

Oh _fuck_.

"Low, girl, we don't…"

"J, I _want _to. I saved myself for you. You're my last kiss, my last everything. You're the one I'm going to marry, you know?" She smiles, and I'm fucking _done_.

"Baby…"

She leans forward and kisses my cheek, soft, sweet, and fucking sexy, her fingers crawling across my back.

My girl is a seductress and has no fucking idea.

"I love you, J," she says, voice shaky but lips and hands so damn confident.

Turning my head, I pull her hair away from her face and kiss her neck. "I love you more, B." I kiss her throat and lick a path to her chin and kiss it, my hands toying with the clasp to her bra but not daring to flick it open, but knowing I'm not going to be able to hold back much longer. "You want me, girl?"

She looks into my eyes and they crinkle with her fucking cute smile. "I've wanted you for freaking forever, J."

Fuck, my girl wants me, she's going to get me.

"Don't be scared, J," she says, making me chuckle, her smile blinding me.

"You're cute, girl," I say and unsnap her bra, the hitch in her breath slaying me.

I'm so fucking _gone_ for her.


	18. love me like you do

Chapter 17  
**love me like you do**

-HM-

The way Jasper's looking at me makes me feel a thousand different emotions.

I'm so freaking scared, but _so _ready.

When my bra falls down my arms, and his eyes slide to my chest, I can't _breathe._ His fingers trail slowly up my hips, his eyes not moving from my chest, and I feel like I'm going to _die._

"Girl…" he breathes, thumbs rubbing along the side of my breasts. I want to be embarrassed and cover myself, but the way he's looking at me - I feel anything _but_ embarrassed. "You're so fucking pretty." His eyes lift, his _lips_ lift, and I can't help the smile I feel on my own face.

"J…"

He places his hand on my chest - over my heart - and I know it's beating a million miles a minute, but he's so warm. "Breathe, B. It's alright." He moves his hand and then his lips are there, whispering soft kisses onto my heart. "I got you, baby."

Oh my _gosh!_

My fingers tangle in his hair, and I close my eyes, loving everything about my guy.

He's so worth every ounce of trouble I'm going to be in. I don't ever want to leave.

I _love_ him.

He licks a path up my chest, my neck, my chin until his lips are pressing against mine - soft and sweet. "Are you sure, girl? You want me?"

I nod slowly and stare into his beautiful blue eyes. "You're my _freaking_ forever, J," I say, making his eyes crinkle and his lips smile.

He lays me back on the bed, kneeling before me, his hands at the waistband of my pants. His thumbs slip in right at the edge, and I hold my breath. His head descends and he kisses my belly and each of my hips before dipping his tongue into my belly button.

"B…" he whispers, looking up at me, some of his hair falling into his eyes.

"I'm ready, J," I say, staring into ocean blue eyes - my _favorite_.

His hands start to pull my pants down, and _oh my gosh!_

-JW-

My heart is pounding so fucking fast. My girl is giving herself to me, and I feel like I've waited years for her.

I knew that day - the first day I laid eyes on her that she'd be mine.

I slowly pull her pants down her legs, _slowly_ revealing cotton pink underwear, and I can't fucking _breathe._

Her chest concaves with each breath she takes, and she lifts her hips so I can pull her pants completely free of her gorgeous legs.

My girl is so fucking beautiful.

Her legs fall open, and I crawl between them, framing her face with my hands. She smiles a shaky smile, making me smile my own shaky smile, and I kiss her perfect lips. "You're so pretty," I say between life-changing kisses. "You're so pretty it fucking hurts, B."

"J…" she gasps, licking her lips. "You're making me crazy."

I want to yank her pink cotton off and pull my own sweats down. I want to feel if she's wet for me. I want to know what it feels like to slide inside of her.

I fucking want it all.

"Low, baby, are you sure?" I ask again - one last time before I take everything from my girl.

Her face softens - reddens - and she nods her head. "I'm ready, J."

I kiss her lips, each of her eyes, her cute fucking nose, until I'm kissing down her chin and licking a path between her breasts. I lift my head and watch her face as I reach up and rub the pad of my thumb over each of her pretty nipples.

She's so fucking pretty all over.

"I like these, B," I say, grinning when she blushes. "Can I put my mouth here?" I lightly pinch her, making her gasp, and my dick is so fucking hard for my girl - so...fucking..._hard._

Low nods, and I keep my eyes on her face as I pull one of her nipples into my mouth. The way she watches me has my heart pounding an uneven beat in my throat. When her hands find my hair, gently pulling, fingers softly scraping against my scalp, I close my eyes and suck her deeper into my mouth.

My girl kills me with her softness.

"J…" she calls, and I look up at her. "Can I see you now?"

Oh _fuck_.

-HM-

Jasper slowly releases my nipple, and he makes me feel warm all over. My heart hurts for how much I love him.

I want to see all of him, and I want him to make love to me.

I'm freaking _dying_.

Jasper stands from the bed and pulls his sweats off, his boxer briefs covering what I want to see most. "J…"

"Shit, girl, I'm fucking nervous," he says, making me giggle. He smiles a heartstopping smile that I feel in my soul.

I always knew Jasper was going to be mine.

He pushes his briefs down his legs, and I stop breathing.

_Oh my gosh!_

My eyes dart to his face to find his head tilted back and his eyes closed, like he doesn't want to see me _see_ him.

He's the most beautiful boy I've ever seen - the _only _boy I've ever seen - the only boy I _want_ to see. My future husband is so freaking beautiful all over.

I don't feel nervous anymore. I want to know what it feels like when Jasper loves me - not just with his heart but his body.

"B…" he says, and I look up at his face. "I want to take your underwear off. Please let me fucking take them off."

I bite my lip and nod my head, and he immediately reaches for the waistband, slowly - _tortuously_ slowly - pulls them off.

"_Fuck_, baby…"

-JW-

Shit.

Oh fuck.

Low's underwear are on the floor, and she's completely naked on my bed. Her dark hair is spread out on my pillow, and I never want her to leave.

_Fuck,_ I don't know how I'm going to do this and then take her back home.

My girl is sneaky - taking a chance of getting in trouble, so she can give me her love, and I'm going to take it.

_All_ of it.

This girl - my fucking girl - was meant to be right fucking here with me inside her, with my heart in her pretty little hands.

I crawl between her legs and kiss her deep but soft and slow. I don't want to fuck my girl. I want to fucking _love_ her. Keeping my lips on hers, I move to her side, letting my hand trail down her flat, cute belly until I feel the wet heat between her legs.

She gasps into my mouth, her tongue pushing against mine. One of her hands is on my shoulder, the other one reaching down to grab my hand. She's so fucking innocent and sweet, and I'd die a thousand deaths just to feel this with her every night for the rest of our fucking lives.

My future wife is _everything._

I run a finger through her wetness, coating my fingers with her sweet innocence, dying to know what she tastes like but not wanting to freak her the fuck out.

"Baby," I whisper, kissing the corner of her mouth. She looks up at me with those gorgeous brown eyes, and I am so fucking lost in her. "I'm going to get you ready, okay?" Her brows crease, and I kiss the other corner of her mouth. Slowly, I slide a finger inside her and _fuck_ she's so tight.

I feel like a fucking virgin right now. My girl is making me shake. She's making my chest ache.

"You okay, B?"

"Yeah, J. I love you," she says.

_Damn, B._

I kiss her chin and push my finger deeper, wanting to savor her sweet gasp. I slowly slide my finger out and push it back again, loving the feel of her, _dying _to be inside her.

When she's taken three of my fingers - just barely - and I've made her come softly, and she's looking at me like she wants nothing more than for me to love her, I slowly pull them from her body and climb back between her legs.

I kiss all over her face. "I love you, girl," I whisper, reaching into the bedside drawer, kind of feeling fucked up to be pulling a condom out, like this is a regular thing for me.

It's not. If my girl only knew how long it's been - that I've been waiting for her to change my life.

I want to marry her.

I want to love her for fucking ever.

When the condom's on, I give her all of my weight and kiss her throat, using a hand to guide myself to her slick entrance, wanting nothing more than to slam inside her just so I can finally feel what it's like to be loved by her.

"J…"

"Shh…it's okay," I say, and slowly - so fucking slowly - push inside my girl.

_Holy fuck._


End file.
